News from the back (of my mind)

Fire fire fire

2011-01-27T12:45:00.000-08:00

I just watched the pilot episode for a TV series from the 70s called Firehouse. I don't know what the series was actually like (it only lasted for 14 episodes), but the pilot was about a black firefighter joining an all white firefighting crew. It was the typical story of battling racism. I found it interesting, though, because I found it hard to be overly sympathetic towards the black character (played by Richard Roundtree, aka SHAFT!)(you legally have to spell it in all caps. The exclamation mark is optional).
Normally in these types of movies, I find myself getting rather outraged at the views and opinions of the racist characters. I find it hard to believe that anyone could ever truly believe that a person's skin colour makes them different or inferior. I felt some of that here, but the black character was a jerk, so it was hard to empathise with him. He didn't try to get along with his new coworkers. He was confrontational and defeatist. He assumed that everything everyone did was because he was black and they hated him, and so he hated them in return. There was only one character that was really hard on him, the rest weren't even all that bad - he just hated them all anyway.
And I found it fascinating, because it is all too common for the minority character in these anti-racism dramas to be much better than everyone else. The black man comes in and is longsuffering and patient and understanding, and everyone is mean until a big crisis makes them rethink their own position and now everything is okay. But in this movie, the anger and sarcasm and ill-will flows equally both ways and both sides have to come to a mutual understanding. Because it was a TV show, at the end, the worst of the white guys finally has some respect for SHAFT, even though "I don't like you, and I probably never will".
On an unrelated note, one fireman dies, and another almost dies in the movie rescuing dogs. That bothers me. I've seen the stickers people can put on their house saying how many pets they have so that the firemen know to rescue all the animals. I don't like it because it means the fireman is rescuing his life to save an animal, and while I understand that pets are important to people and like a member of the family, I don't think they are worth risking a person's life for - especially someone who's job is saving lives. That fireman who died could have rescued (if it were real life) many more people who may now not live because he was trying to save a dog. I don't agree. I know that makes me a horrible person, but that's just my take on the matter. Maybe my attitude would change if I had a pet. But that day is far away.

My two cents

2011-01-16T23:07:00.000-08:00

"I disagree with what you say, but I'll defend to the death your right to say it." It's a phrase heard often in debates, especially in a controversial topic. It sounds like a very noble sentiment, but it bothers me the more I hear it. I agree that free speech is important - it seems that all of the worst dictatorships were quick to strike that freedom down. The problem is, there is no reason to point it out except as a way of proving ones superiority over an opponent.
There is a smugness that comes with saying that - it's a way of saying that not only am I right, I am better than you because I will allow you to say what you want, no matter how wrong you are. Unless you are actually having a discussion on free speech, there is no reason to say it other than to make yourself look better than your opponent. How does it make a difference on the morality of abortion if you are willing to hear me say my peace? How does the existence or not of the holocaust rest on the fact that you will let me say what I believe, even if you disagree? The fact is, those issues don't change because you allow me to say what I believe - the issues stay the same. The only difference is, now you look like you are magnanimous and more understanding and a better person, and maybe that will sway some people.
Like I said, it comes across very smug and can even be almost taunting. It doesn't change the issue, and in fact probably hurts your chance of swaying the one you are arguing with because now they think you are a magnanimous jerk with a superiority complex.
Anyway, that's my two cents, and you can agree or disagree as you like, but frankly, don't tell me that you'll allow me to speak. I already have.

I'd Love To Help, Just Give Me Five Days...

2010-12-28T11:21:00.001-08:00

I can't figure out why there are still 'business days', at least in regards to the banks. Everything is run by and on computers now. Interest on loans and credit cards is calculated and charged daily. Yet when I make a payment or process some funds, it takes five business days for computers (which can process information almost instantly) for that payment to go through. That shouldn't be.
It should be possible to, within a single day (even a weekend), have that money, which is only electronic anyways, go from my account to wherever it is going. Why does it take five days for the computer to move a bunch of ones and zeros to another computer. It shouldn't. I can instantly look at my account and my credit card, so why can't the money flow that quickly? Does it take five days to verify that I have the money there? No. I just checked and it was there. Does it take five days to fly across the country? No, it takes a few moments to sync up security systems. What's the wait? I can't figure it out.
I guess there are some explanations. I'm just not sure how cynical to be. Maybe, because of the sheer volume of information, the computer systems aren't able to handle everything instantly, and delaying is the only way to keep from crashing everything completely. I have trouble truly believing this because it seems like too big of a coincidence that the computers need the same amount of time as the banks needed in non-computer ages.
Which makes me think that it is a resistance to change. Banks have always operated on less convenient hours than most people nowadays live. I suppose it is a holdout from the early days of banks when life was vastly different than it is now - when there wasn't 24 hour everything. In some ways, the current world is a bit more conducive to banking hours because there are more people who work evenings and weekends, leaving them time during the weekdays to make it to the bank. But still, the world has changed, computers, evil though they may be, are able to do things much faster than we ever thought possible in the past, so why do we still need business days to process something? Why are 'five business days' really 'one week or more'? Even with taking five days, the weekends shouldn't affect the time. If we really need five days, why do we need to worry about the weekends? Do computers take Saturday and Sunday off? Does my Toshiba know that Sunday was Christmas so it decided not to operate that day? The only way it makes sense is if there is such a massive resistance to change that the banks and financial institutes have decided to just not change it even though they could. They're scared of the technology and so they hide from it as best they can.
The only other explanation I can think of is that it is a conspiracy, if you will, of bank fees and profits. By taking the extra time they can increase the money they get from interest and from fees. Poor timing means that late fees can be charged. They have the power and their isn't much we can do, so as long as they are looking for maximum profits (and that is the heart of capitalism after all), then ease, convenience and user friendliness take a back seat to profits. The only way things get better for the consumer is if it will create more profits for the company. There is no altruism in business. Sweat shops exist because consumers demand lowest prices and businesses want maximum profits. Something's gotta give, and it is those who can be easily exploited that are. Even things like fair trade can be viewed fairly cynically - the companies that do it are mostly interested in looking good for the growing segment of socially conscious consumers. They would rather be buying their product for the lowest possible price and selling it for the maximum possible price. And that was a bit of a tangent, but not much because the principles apply to banks and financial institutions (though I don't think there is much slave labour in banks - they probably just pay their tellers as little as they can, but it's nothing like sweat shops).
Sadly, I think it is a combination of resistance to change and addiction to high profits. The world is changing, but not as much as it should be, and not for as much good as it should be. I can understand a resistance to change - I'm someone who likes routines and comforts. But I have way less interest in profit and business.

Pepe?

2010-08-10T22:27:00.000-07:00

I saw a skunk. Near my window! Now understand what I mean by near my window - when it saw us coming, it stopped touching my window with its nose and waddled away. I walked around the side of my house with Beth and noticed some movement and realised that the small black shape moving towards the truck in the driveway had two white stripes on his back. And he was hopping and speaking French.
The worst part was, I got to the car, sighed and headed back because I had left my keys inside. I have never felt so paranoid walking down my driveway before. I whistled softly so as to warn him that I was coming without scaring him. And then, once I had my keys, I had to walk down the driveway again. I'm pulling my sweater tighter around me, like it's going to protect me from the spray of a skunk.
I hope the skunk decides to move on.

Maybe they were pretty and inspiring wagons...

2010-07-04T22:07:00.000-07:00

Many cultures have names that are rich with meaning. I know that most Asian names are given because of the meaning. Today I met a Korean woman whose name means 'Grace and Pearl' (her name is made up of two characters), so she is either a graceful pearl or a pearl of grace, according to her name. I also met a Chinese man whose name meant 'Great Life', or something to that effect (I liked the Pearl one better, so it stuck).
Peter comes from ancient Greek meaning 'Stone', and while not as poetic in itself, it has a very strong significance considering its Biblical origins ("on this stone I will build my church").
Christopher also comes from Greek and means 'bearing Christ'.
Jeffrey is a bit muddled, but the last part definitely means 'peace', with the first half possibly meaning 'gift' (so a 'gift of peace').
David is derived from the Hebrew for 'beloved'.
Bethany means 'house of figs' (which I'm sure had a positive meaning when it was first used)
Heather is a type of shrub with pink and white flowers, and who doesn't like flowers?
Wesley means 'west meadow'
As you can see, many names have meanings that are pretty or significant somehow. Why am I bringing all of this up, you ask? Because I got curious and I wondered what my name meant.
Darrell - From an English surname which was derived from Norman French d'Airelle, originally denoting one who came from Airelle in France
Wayne - From an occupational surname meaning "wagon maker"
Ulriksen - Son of Ulrik.
I have the least poetic name ever.

(Scott means, well, Scottish. Not poetical, but at least you have David, lucky stiff)
(Ulrich means 'prosperity and power', but my last name isn't Ulrich, it's Ulriksen, so it doesn't count as poetical, it counts as the son of poetical)
(In case you were wondering, Airelle is in the northwest part of France)

So Long, Old Pal

2010-06-16T22:45:00.000-07:00

Everyone, say goodbye to Thor.
And say hello to ...?... um, my new car. Perhaps Susan, perhaps Suzy, but most likely a different name. I'm not sure yet.
She is a 2001 Hyundai Accent GSI. She is a little four speed that won't win any power contests, but will likely cut my fuel bill in half.
I got her for a very reasonable price from the same used car dealer that sold me Vanessa, my 1989 Crown Victoria LTD, possibly my favourite car I've ever owned (though the Comet would have to come close). My new car isn't nearly as big, but she's been all right for me so far.
As you may be able to tell, she is a standard, and though I didn't go looking for a standard specifically, I'm glad I found one that was in my price range because I quite enjoy the standard, though my left leg is a little tired. It's not used to being in use quite that much.
Oddly enough, this is almost the exact same car that Beth's family owns, except mine has a sunroof, a spoiler on the back, and working windshield wipers. Also, I have been enjoying having turn signals and being able to unlock my driver's side door with my key, and being able to open the driver's side door with the inside handle (as opposed to rolling down the window and opening it with the outside handle). Plus, it is much quieter when I drive it.
Thor was in rough shape and getting rougher. The hood was still a little crumpled from when I had my fender bender last year, and the one light was pushed in slightly (it still worked, but I can't guarantee it pointed anywhere useful). As mentioned, the turn signal, the driver's side lock and the the driver's side inside door handle were all non-functioning. The odometer had read the same mileage since I purchased him, and the travel odometer would sometimes run backwards on the highway (which, admittedly, was kinda neat). And when I tried to remove the front driver's side tire (to look at the brakes)(which I'll explain in a second) I had to remove the last lugnut with an impact drill.
The car had started making a grinding sound when I drove it. I thought it might be the brakes, so I checked them out, but they looked fine. It was an awful sound and I didn't know what it was, but I did know it was getting worse and that it would be expensive to fix it. And then reverse started acting very sticky and hesitant, like it didn't want to shift, maybe. I would put it into reverse and take my foot off the gas and it wouldn't want to roll back on its own. I had to touch the gas to get it going. That made me think that it might be the transmission, a problem that is harder and more expensive than brakes, which was bad enough.
The last time I drove it I was actually concerned that it wouldn't make it. I parked it and bought a car the next morning (I had looked at it already and got the information I needed to make a good choice). So Thor will soon be out of my life completely, though the memories will remain. I guess I will just have to enjoy ...?...
I need to find a good name for her.

P.S. Peter, my new car has all four hubcaps, because I knew you were wondering.

Nerd it up Brosef

2010-04-25T13:08:00.000-07:00

I visited the Calgary Comic Expo today. I went for one reason - Dave Kellett, creator of the Sheldon comic strip, and all around nice guy, was there and I wanted to meet him. He was super friendly and I wished I could have chatted with him longer, but there is a line between fan and stalker, and I didn't want to cross that line. But I did get him to do a sketch in one of his books. This first picture is him doing the sketch.

This next one is him posing with his sketch. The drawing is of a character from Sheldon named Flaco, a small lizard, and the pilot of a spaceship from his sci-fi comic. The pilot doesn't have a name yet (when the strip started, he had lost his memory and no one knows his name, and Dave ain't tellin'!

Boba Fett with a stormtrooper.

A Death Star troop. The little thing he was holding in his hand was a remote control device, which he was (not) (wink-wink-nudge-nudge) using to control...
R2-D2. This was pretty cool. It moved around and beeped and seemed pretty much like the R2 unit from the films. I was pretty impressed.
The Expo was kinda neat. I got to see Brent Spiner (Data from TNG) and Malcolm MacDowell (the guy who killed Kirk and Star Trek: Generations)(and other movies)(probably). I didn't talk to them, and I sure wasn't going to pay to get an autograph from them, but I saw them.

Live Long and have elevensies.

2010-04-18T14:43:00.000-07:00

Any time I start to take Star Trek too seriously, I direct my attention to this video. It helps me to remember that the people on the show were just actors, and sometimes, they obviously really needed to make some money.
Still a Trek fan, though.

Too bad the cars aren't made of cardboard...

2010-04-14T03:25:00.000-07:00

I have been getting into a show called Canada's Worst Driver. It is an amusing and a sobering show at the same time. It is amusing because the people on this show are frighteningly bad, and for some reason it is amusing to watch. They smash into stuff all the time and that is kind of cool to see. And the drivers are so bad that it's funny, but only because they aren't driving near me. I think I'm befuddled at how these people ever managed to get licenses in the first place (one woman had the instructor drive the hard parts of the test for her). It's like a train wreck, and the way they drive, they are likely to cause a train wreck.
But it is sobering as well. I find myself wondering how many of these tests I could pass, and I wonder if I'm a good enough driver. I know that I spend less time on my cell phone than I used to and I try to keep my eye on the road more. I guess it counts as educational TV because I am trying to be a better driver because of it.
But mostly I watch it to see them smash into boxes!

Fully Back

2010-04-01T11:36:00.001-07:00

I have been on a few missions trips, and I find that it takes a long time to get back and turn my brain from mush into something resembling functional.
First off, I'm not a huge fan of plane rides. I have trouble sleeping on planes and don't really feel comfortable napping in airports. It took us somewhere around 30 hours to get to our destination and I was so wiped out when we got there. We didn't leave Calgary until 11pm, so by the time we finally got to Jinghong, I had been awake for 48 hours (with a couple of 20 minute or less cat naps thrown in). I'm surprised I woke up at all.
Once we got there, we found that the orphanage was on the second floor of an apartment building. The group we were working with owns the second through fifth floors of the apartment (the first is for shops). The orphanage is on the second floor, the third floor is offices and a leprosy clinic, the fourth floor is guest quarters and conference room, and the fifth floor headquarters the HIV/AIDS project and the Commercial Sex Workers Project (getting women off of the streets). The balcony on the second floor was huge (literally bigger than my apartment) and that is where the playground was going. The plan was to lay down a cement floor with tiles and then to put the playground equipment on top. And the troubles began right away.
Communication, I learned, is very key to these sorts of trips, and very hard to do. Part of the problem was that the man who had originally envisioned this project had ended up having to go back to Australia after everything was too far in motion to stop. And then his replacement worked with us for a while before he too had to leave. When we finally arrived, we were dealing with people who had been there for a month and didn't really know much about the project specifically. They were a young couple, very nice people, who had only been in China for a year, which raised another problem.
We only spoke English, and the project manager, a Chinese national, didn't speak much English at all, so we had to rely on the young American couple to translate everything for us. Their Chinese (I think it was Mandarin, but I can't remember anymore) was good, but still limited. It wasn't a problem when they helped us order food, but to speak about more technical things, such as tools and mixing cement, they didn't have the vocabulary. To be fair, I didn't always know what they were talking about in English, I can't imagine trying to translate into another language.
Add to that, the fact that in China they lay tiles very differently than we do here. The project manager had assumed that we knew how they do it, and we had assumed that we would just do it the same way we would back home. We ended up wasting a day and a half in trying to figure out what we were doing and whether it would work. The project manager hadn't really done concrete and tiles before, so he didn't know exactly how to do it, which meant he couldn't really explain it to us. It would be like me telling someone from China how to lay concrete and tile here. I could give them the basic idea and do some online research, but when it came time to actually doing it, I would be guessing and hoping it worked out right. Eventually we decided to do it a more North American way, since we knew how to do that and that it would work.
Truthfully, I felt a little bad about that. In some ways it felt like we were being the knowledgeable Westerners coming in to solve the problems of the stupid foreigners. That wasn't really the attitude we had, and we did try it, but it just didn't seem to be working - the tile wasn't going to stay and the concrete underneath would just crumble. We learned later that how we had been told to do it was basically correct, but the details had been wrong so it wouldn't have worked (we needed to adjust the ratio or something like that) so it was good we changed it.
But this is the dilemma I have found myself in since coming back. There are some who feel that short term missions trips do more damage than good and that they aren't worth the expense. I had never given it a great deal of thought, but I could see that point. I still thought that they were a fine thing to do if done properly, but I have begun to waver. In my community development class we have been told repeatedly that true development and change does not come when we do for locals what they could do for themselves. In this case, we didn't need to do the work. We could raise the money and donate it to them (there are even issues with that, but this post is long enough already) and they could have hired locals to do the job, and it would have been done without issue, and probably twice as quick. So what was the point of us going?
The only thing that is keeping me from writing off missions trips altogether is the change it has on the people who go on the trips. The American couple who worked there were inspired by a missions trip in their youth to work overseas. Would they have discovered that calling otherwise? It is hard to hear that sort of thing in North America. There are so many other, louder voices telling us to make money and buy things and live this 'American Dream' if you will. Right from birth that is the message preached. In school, the goal of education has been reduced to 'get a good education to get a good job to make lots of money'. When I was in grades 11 and 12, that is what I heard all the time. I had to make the choices then that would lead me to the best possible college to the career that would set me up for life. I was never comfortable with that, and I'm still not.
That may be why I have drifted as much as I have. I have never been comfortable with the message of 'life is about making money', but I have either been unaware of my options, or just scared of stepping out. I may not like rampant consumerism, but it is what I was raised in (not by my parents, but by society and culture - my parents were very good with trying to teach otherwise and not pressuring us into high-income jobs just to make money) and it is comfortable. Heck, that is half of its appeal - it is a comfortable mindset because it is devoted to one's own comfort.
Anyway, the end result of China is that it freaked me out because I saw up close what it would mean to leave home and go overseas. Talking with the young American couple and seeing how their lives were different here than they would have been in North America made me realise that it is a complete change. I knew that before, but seeing it is different. But at the same time, I kept having a confidence, even in my freak, that I could do it. Going to China didn't provide clear cut answers and diamond sharp clarity, but it did give me more realistic perspective and a feeling of confidence that I can sometimes access. That seems to be how God talks to me - he doesn't use a clear voice, but more of nudges and small nods. I don't know if that's normal, but it's what I know.
Also, I ate donkey stew. Tasty.

P.S. I didn't name names or get to specific with details in this post for a reason. Though the religious situation in China isn't nearly as bad as some would have us believe, it is still China, so I don't want to push things and get people in trouble.

P.P.S. The kids at the orphanage were adorable. I can't think of them without having that happy-sad feeling. They were cute and wonderful and precious and being with them made me happy, but I was also sad that they were just abandoned and that no one wanted them.

China Pictures

2010-03-23T18:29:00.000-07:00

Here we go, some pictures from my time in China. Hope you enjoy...or at least aren't too bored.

Our team at the Calgary airport before leaving.
Back row (l-r): Clare, Jim, Me, Roland
Front row (l-r): Debbi, Mimi, Diane, Janet

At the Vancouver airport, praying for our trip.

On the box at the KFC in the Hong Kong airport. Apparently they serve cat...?

The airport at Jinghong, which is the city. Xishuang Banna is the area in Yunnan province. I think. These sorts of things are done differently there than here.

A friendly little salamander from our lodgings. He disappeared after the second day.

The playground was to be built on the balcony of the orphanage, which was on the second floor of an apartment building. These two pictures are the two sides of the balcony before we began. The sand was to mix with the cement. By hand.

Here is the sand for the sandbox, which we had to build.

And this is the sandbox, mostly finished.

Here is some cement in the middle of being mixed.

Milk in a bag. But not in the fridge...on purpose. I just can't get used to that.

The guys doing some work. I worked too, except when I was taking pictures.

One of the many cool little cars we saw on the roads.

The bird in Jinghong. And when I say the bird, I mean the only bird. I guess when times were really tough in the past, people ate all of the wild birds and they haven't come back yet.

A giant Buddhist statue near our lodging.

We visited a traditional Dai village (the Dai people being a Chinese minority). This is the typical Dai house, built on stilts. I never heard an explanation why.

These guys kinda creeped me out.

The Dai village put on their ancient water throwing festival every year. It used to be a sacred ritual, but now it is just an excuse for a water fight.

It was Chinese New Year's while we were there. They celebrate by trying to blow up the country.

Ooh, pretty.

How to tell a good restaurant: they wrap their plates and glasses in plastic. That means they've been sanitised.

You have to go to China to find something made in America.

Another shot of the sand. How I loathe thee...

Cars would go on whatever side of the road they darn well pleased.

Our finished sandbox with more sand in it.

Who needs a bus when you can cram your entire workforce into the back of a truck?

The English translations weren't always great.

My favourite Chinese characters - a dead owl and Screamy Lad!

The end of stage one - the cement floor is laid. Now we have to put down some tile.

But first, attack of the giant statue!

We visited the Buddhist temple. It was interesting.

The Buddhist statue overlooks the city. Kinda freaky.

In the spirit of the New Year's celebrations, we blew some stuff up too.

We visited a tea farm. These are some tea bushes that are a few hundred years old.

They would pick the leaves, dry them, shred them, crush them, and then sell them.

Our first tile. Shortly after this picture was taken, we removed the tile and made some adjustments.

Some of the tools we used.

The 'completed' job. We weren't actually done, but this was as far as our team got. The next team finished the job.

Our team at...

THE END

So sleepy

2010-03-09T22:02:00.000-08:00

I am now back from China, all safe and sound. It is hard to find words for an experience like that, and since I came back I have been busy and not able to reflect well or feel too rested, so a report is still coming, along with pictures. Soon, though. Very soon.
Also, Fools of us All is on hiatus for a while, probably until the summer. I am taking an International Development class and that is taking the time that Fools could fit in to for the moment. Don't despair, though, it shall return.
And, like I said, an update on China is coming soon.

I'm gonna miss the Olympics

2010-02-08T17:38:00.000-08:00

In a little less than an hour, I will be on my way to China. Technically, I'll be on my way to the airport where I have to stand around for three hours until I get on the plane to fly to Vancouver where we wait for a while before we fly to China. But I will leave my house in a little less than an hour.
I am very excited and a little nervous. I already miss Beth (she had to go to class), but I am looking forward to seeing her again. I hope I will be able to do the work we need to do. I don't know what exactly we are doing beyond 'building a playground', and that there is concrete involved somehow. I am guessing we will have to dig some holes for posts, and pour concrete for a solid foundation and...screw things together....? I bet I carry a bunch of stuff.
Well, I don't have much profound to say here. Hope God blesses this trip greatly. I have a feeling he will.
Toodles

Meanwhile, somewhere in China...

2010-01-31T23:06:00.000-08:00

Wow, only one week until I head off to China. I am feeling both excited and anxious. And tired. But not hungry cuz I just ate some nachos. Mmm...nachos.
I am excited because this is an adventure. I get to see a culture I have never seen up close before. I get to be somewhere I have never been. And it is supposed to be warm. You don't know how excited I am about that part. I love being warm in February. These are all things that are pretty awesome.
But I am anxious (heck, downright scared at times) because there is so much unknown. I don't know the language or the culture. I don't know what the food will be like. We are building a playground which I have never done before, so how will that look? Will I be able to physically do the work. I don't really know anyone on the team very well (and I am at least twenty years younger than all of them...the leaders of the the team are in their late sixties or early seventies) and that is a bit nerve racking. Wracking? Scary.
I guess it's a good thing that God is a pretty big gender non-specific deity (or dude, as I like to call him)(dear dude, you rock. Amen). I know in my head that he can control all of this and protect me and give me strength. However, as a feeler, it is easy to get caught up in the heart, which is much less certain of things. Luckily for me, my heart is often willing to go with what my head is telling it, so I will manage to push through and put my trust where it needs to be at least most of the time. Please pray for me to get along with the team and to be able to do the work and to somehow leave where I'm going a better place than it was when I got there.

Also, Grasp the Nettle, if you dare.

Should make for interesting radio around here

2010-01-31T10:00:00.000-08:00

There was a big trade in hockey today between Toronto and Calgary. TSN posted their story about at 12:47 pm est today (Sunday). By 12:58 est today (Sunday) they had 839 comments on the story. Some people are for, some people are against, both sides raise good arguments (I read 20 of the comments out of curiosity), but, as I stated before, I don't put much stock in what is said in the comments, I'm just surprised that that many people commented that quickly.
Actually, on second thought, I'm not that surprised. Sports fan are pretty obsessive, and over-the-top obsessive compulsiveness is the defining characteristic of most internet posters, so when the two collide, it gets awfully noisy on the internet.

Also, J.D. Salinger died on Wednesday. I wonder what will happen next...

Finally it makes sense

2010-01-30T08:42:00.000-08:00

Journalism explained.

Warning, language alert.

Almost Seems Pointless

2010-01-28T23:03:00.000-08:00

I find that I don't trust the masses, especially on the internet. Whenever I see a poll conducted by a radio or TV station, I basically immediately discard the results because I don't trust that the people voting have knowledge about what they are voting on.
And the internet is worse. It seems that most people find it too easy to say whatever they feel like without regard to the feelings of others or without any consideration to other points of view. I realise that is a gross generalisation, but I am not the first person to notice that most message boards quickly devolve into mindless insults, flame wars, and virtual abuse (unless they are heavily monitored).
I suppose it could be that it is mostly these sorts of people who post and that the less angry people don't bother. I know I don't usually comment on things. I don't see much point. If I don't have any knowledge on a subject, what could I add to the conversation besides a question or two, and how could I trust the response? I don't know who is answering. They could say they are an expert when they are really not. Without that personal relationship, or verifiable credentials, I find it hard to trust the value of their information and contribution.
But that's just me.

Finale

2010-01-14T23:25:00.000-08:00

Earlier today, I started my computer and once it was all booted up, I couldn't move the cursor on the screen. I have a laptop and I use the little touchpad thing and it wouldn't do anything, and the buttons wouldn't work either. It was like someone had unplugged the mouse, which is weird because I don't have a mouse. I had to ctrl+alt+delete and use the arrow keys to log out and then hit enter to sign back in, and then the mouse worked. Computers are weird.

Today I am updating the final bit of Thunderfunk the Superchicken. I had fun writing it, hope you had fun reading it. If you want a copy of it from beginning to end, let me know and I can email it to you. It may be easier to read that way. I will continue with Fools of us All, though updates may continue being spotty for a while. I've been busy lately.

Mmm...chocolate.

2010-01-09T23:43:00.000-08:00

I am sitting here, late at night, eating way too many Toffifees and drinking half-flat grapefruit soda straight from the bottle and it occurs to me - most of the time when I need to take an elevator, I have to wait for at least a few seconds, if not longer. So how is it that the members of the USS Enterprise (NCC 1701-D) can just step up to the turbolift doors and walk right in. What if someone left the bridge and a few minutes later someone else tried to leave the bridge. Why would the turbolift car be right there again? Does it detect movement and move into position almost instantly, faster than anyone could survive if they were inside? Shouldn't they have to wait at least sometimes? I can maybe understand the bridge always having a car at the ready, but it seems to be the same for every deck.
I guess I'm only asking out of jealousy and impatience. I don't like waiting for elevators.

Chinese Update

2010-01-06T23:38:00.001-08:00

I talked to the church yesterday, and all of the money I needed for my trip to China has come in. I'm going to China!

Holy vacuum cleaner bags! I'm going to China!

Now that the money is raised, I only have a couple more things to do to get ready. I have to get a couple more shots. I need to get my visa (an easy process I should have done next week), and I need to stare around wide-eyed for a while as I realise what I am about to do. I am going halfway around the world to a culture as different from mine as I can imagine. At least in Europe I looked like I fit in. In China I am going to be able to see over the heads of everyone in the country (stereotyped joke I know, but also generally true, so I've been told). I will stick out like a roast pig at a vegetarian conference. It is a bit of a daunting task that I have in front of me. I am looking forward to it.
If anyone was thinking of contributing to my trip but just hadn't quite gotten around to it, there is still one of our team members that is having trouble raising the rest of his funds. So if you still want to contribute, just say that it is for Adam instead of me and that would be helpful.

Anyway, I updated Grasp the Nettle again.

Christmas Roundup

2010-01-04T22:26:00.000-08:00

This year, I managed to get some time off of work and head home for Christmas. Yay! I haven't been home for three years, so it was nice to finally get to see the family over the holidays. This year was our big family Christmas at the Strasbourg Bible Camp. There was over forty of us there - uncles, aunts, grandparents, brothers, cousins, etc, all from my mom's side of the family. It is weird to see some of my cousins getting so old. I still see them as being just little babies.
It was a good time, hanging out with everyone. There were plenty of games and lots of food. Mmm...food. I got to see all of my nephews, which was cool. They are growing up so fast. My two oldest nephews are in school already, and they're getting so big.
The trouble didn't start until late Saturday night. I had been feeling fine, but finally had to go to bed. I was tired and had to drive back to Calgary the next day. I went to sleep fairly easily, but awoke rather soon, feeling a but queasy. I got up and went to the washroom, but didn't really feel any better. I dozed for a bit, and then had to use the washroom again. By this time the stomach is doing full flip flops and summersaults. I had grabbed the room's garbage can and put it by my bed, just in case. The rather large piece of pie I had eaten just before bed was sitting on top of everything like a lump.
Finally, I leapt to my feet and ran to the bathroom, making it just in time. I am not a fan of upchucking, but I am always glad when I feel better afterwards, even if only a little. I cleaned and brushed my teeth real good, throwing out my toothbrush afterwards because eww. I didn't really get any sleep after that, just dozing and feeling somewhat miserable.
I finally got up in the morning and slowly packed my things. There were a few people feeling ill that morning, making for a rather icky feeling group. We cleaned up the camphouse and packed everyone's cars. I was feeling a little better, especially once I got something to drink. The thought of eating made me feel ill. I thought I would be fine to get to Calgary, so I set out, boldly driving onwards.
When I saw the sign that said 'Swift Current 45', I got mad at the sign because it refused to tell me that I was already at Swift Current. I'm not even kidding - I was actually mad at the sign. That was when I knew that I probably shouldn't be on the road any longer.
I managed to make it to SC and I pulled into the first hotel I saw...actually, there are two lies in that sentence. I passed by the first hotel because I wasn't feeling sick enough to stay there. I still had some pride. And I didn't pull right into the hotel parking lot, not right away.
You see, as I was nearing the entrance, I gently applied the brakes, knowing that it might be icy and wanting to slow down enough to make a safe turn. The person behind me, however, did not slow down at all. That meant that he was catching up to me very quickly, so I hit the gas again to speed up a bit and avoid an accident. I panicked a little and decided to try a hard turn into the entrance. In the summer I would have been fine. Might have squealed the tires a bit, but I would have made it. But this was winter, and the second I left the patch of road that was cleared and dry from people driving on it, my car just slid forward. All I could do was hold on and hope I didn't hit the snowbank too hard. I didn't, but it went far enough to get me stuck.
Once I had determined that I could not get out, I got out and walked into the hotel (it was a rather lengthy driveway before the parking lot - probably about a city block) and checked into a room. I went up to the room and called the tow truck (CAA) from there. It took an hour for the truck to arrive and then I was pulled out, no damage to the car, and brought the rest of my stuff into the room. I then crawled into bed, around three thirty in the afternoon, and did not crawl out until 9 the next morning, except to use the washroom many many many times.
I felt better the next morning and managed to make it home to Calgary. I only missed one day of work and am feeling all better now. The moral of the story is - in the winter, don't follow too close, and pay attention to the cars in front of you.

Grasp the Nettle

Tidings, Cheer, etc...

2009-12-21T23:16:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas all. To those I am going to see - see you soon. To those I won't, have a joyous week.

Next Season...

2009-12-18T08:00:00.000-08:00

Jack vs. Santa

Also, Grasp the Nettle

Merry Gassy Christmas

2009-12-10T21:57:00.000-08:00

I have been finding some ads for Esso interesting lately. With Christmas being around the corner, every retail business is advertising their Christmas deals and specials, and Esso is no exception. But it is an odd business to be advertising Christmas deals because they mostly sell gas and snacks, neither of which make great gifts. I can just imagine opening a gift Christmas morning only to find a gallon of gas, and being so surprised and pleased that the cigarette dangling from my lips* would fall into the can, setting off the fumes and everyone gets to see a wonderful Christmas fireworks show.
But essentially that is what they are advertising. Technically, they are advertising Esso gift cards, but to hear them talk about them in the commercials, you would think they were selling solid gold gas caps or a majority stake in Doritos or something. If you go buy the hype and excitement evident in the ads, then Esso gift cards are the perfect gift for anyone. Plus, they are 'collector's editions with hockey designs'. You can collect all three...? What is the point of collecting gift cards? Don't you just use them? What are you going to do, put them in sleeves and sell them later. "I'll trade you these three Esso hockey gift cards for you Wayne Gretzky rookie card!" "I don't know, that's not a fair trade. I will give you my Bobby Orr rookie card as well."
Sometimes I wonder what aliens would think if they came down and saw all of this Christmas stuff.
Anyway, I updated Grasp the Nettle. I am nearing the end of Thunderfunk the Superchicken, so be sure to watch over the next few weeks to see the exciting conclusion!

*Just joking, kids. I don't smoke. Smoking is gross. Say nope to dope and ugh to drugs!

Brr

2009-12-08T22:53:00.001-08:00

I just realised that I am often more tired in the winter because the cold weather takes so much of my energy that it leaves me tireder than in warmer weather when I am warm and cozy even when I am outside and then, after some bartering, we managed to purchase the monkey for a fair price but we quickly realised that the monkey was going to eat us out of house and home quite literally because we lived in a banana and when I am too cold and tired my mind starts to wander and I almost fall asleep on my couch which matches the footstool I have by a strange coicidence because I didn't buy the couch or the stool because it is much easier to get the furniture for free from people who don't want it anymore as long as you don't mind having stuff that is new or in pristine shape, which I am not because I am still young and living on my own and I don't really care if things are coordinated or not, which explains much of my wardrobe I suppose, though to be fair, blue jeans, if they are nice, can go with almost anything as long as you are staying somewhat casual because dressing up requires clothes that are a little bit nicer like the pair of khakis that I have for business type use like when I go on job interviews, something I don't really like doing because I hate the cold weather and want it to warm up!

Grasp the Nettle

It's already December

2009-12-03T22:48:00.000-08:00

I had Thursday off, and it felt like a Sunday or Saturday all day. It feels weird that I have to go back to work and that it is Friday because it doesn't feel like it is a Friday.
Weird.

I updated Grasp the Nettle. Today is the fourth last chapter in the story. We are nearing the ned. I mean end.

Riderville

2009-11-30T21:06:00.000-08:00

So the Riders lost yesterday. That was sad, but in the end, it's just a game, and I had fun watching it. I am worried that Rider fans will do something stupid again, like when they dumped manure on Paul McCallum's lawn when he missed a field goal.
I enjoy sports, and I can even get emotionally involved in them, but I am at least aware that they are just a game and not the most life altering thing in the world. I shake my head at how into it some people get. It is like there is no perspective for some of these fans - they can't relax and just enjoy it.
And it is worse in the U.S.A. Sports, especially college sports, are a religion down there. They like football more than they like their families. It is worrisome to me sometimes.
All that to say, I will still cheer for the Riders. It was a fun season and I look forward to next year.
Also, I updated Grasp the Nettle again.

Fuzzy Thought

2009-11-25T22:19:00.000-08:00

The first time I ever got bellybutton lint was a few years ago. It's still a little odd to see it. And it's almost always blue, no matter what I'm wearing.
Odd.

Morning song

2009-11-21T17:11:00.000-08:00

Lately, I've been waking up with a different song stuck in my head every morning. And, of course, it is not the whole song, but just a line or two of the song. It just goes over and over and over and over in my head, and I find myself whistling it or humming it and it drives me nuts. Sometimes I have to play some music just to drown it out. And some of the songs have been pretty obscure, ones that I haven't heard in a long time. I have no idea why they are all coming out. It is like I have filled my head and now the songs are leaking out.
Bah.

2010

2009-11-18T22:49:00.000-08:00

I watched the movie 2012 over the weekend. It had its problems, but it was all right. You know what to expect when you go in, and it doesn't exceed those expectations, but it mostly meets them. I did wonder about the scene where they are flying and the magnetic poles suddenly shifted (the south pole was now somewhere in Wisconsin). It seems to me that such an event would cause problems in a plane, but I could be wrong. I don't know much about how magnetism works or how it would affect a plane.
So I went to the 'goofs' section of imdb.com's 2012 page to see if anyone had mentioned that. There was nothing about the magnetic poles, but there were some good points and plot holes raised. But there were some so-called goofs that I found to be somewhat ridiculous.
I don't know why this bothers me so much.

They take a plane called an Antonov and want to fly from Las Vegas to somewhere in China. Someone said: "There was no need to make a fuel stop all - the flight range of the Antonov AN-225 Russian aircraft is 15400 kilometers, which is way more then enough to reach China." That is assuming the plane was filled to capacity with fuel. But it was transporting cars to and from car shows. It may not have been going further than Hawaii, so it would not have necessarily been filled all the way. Plus there was a great deal of chaos surrounding the events preceding take off (California mostly disappears into the ocean somewhere around here), so even if they wanted to fill it up all the way, it may not have been possible right then. The fact that it didn't have enough gas to fill up the tanks is not a mistake, but instead shows how things weren't normal or running smoothly.

Arnold Schwarzenegger's term as Governor of California ends in January, 2011. Apparently this person thinks that people can't get reelected.

And this is the one that irritated me the most: Russians are Orthodox Christians, not Catholics - they don't cross themselves from left to right as Catholics do, they do it from right to left. Dear Russia: Please stop letting your citizens convert to Catholicism. It is confusing this poor person. Sincerely, someone who realises that no matter where a person lives, he can pick what religion he wants to. Well, I guess some places that is less true than others. But I don't think Russia is one of them, not any more.

I really don't know why I got so irked when I read those, but it just bothers me when people get overly nit-picky with the movies. It is like they want the movie to conform to their logic and experience, and if it doesn't, that means the movie is wrong. It just kinda bugs me.

Anyway, I will be updating my Grasp the Nettle stories again soon. I just took a bit of a break because I was busy. I'm still busy, but I think I am getting my timing figured out again.

Going a bit further than Winnipeg.

2009-10-20T10:09:00.000-07:00

I am going on a missions trip to China in February. Our team will be doing two things while there. Half of us will be building a playground for an orphanage. The other half will be running the orphanage for a week to give the regular workers some time off. I guess they haven't had a vacation in five years. The orphanage is called Seth House and is "a home for children with major limitations (physical and mental)". So kids with down syndrome or cleft palates or things of that nature. Basically they are children that were not perfect and so were not wanted by the parents (who, I believe, are only allowed one child under Chinese law). Rather than let the kids be killed, Seth House takes them in and cares for them and trains parents who want to adopt how to care for the children. They have helped place many children in homes over the past five years. I can't remember an exact count, but I think it is something like thirty.
Anyway, I will be sending out a letter to about it in the near future. The cost is around $2500 including flight and I will need a little help with that. I am quite excited to go.
On an unrelated note, my hands are really dry today.
Also, I updated Grasp the Nettle.
Oh yeah, we will be in Jinghong Banna in China. I think it might be here. But I am not really sure.

Thanksgiving Photos

2009-10-14T03:52:00.001-07:00

I spent the Thanksgiving weekend up at my brother's place. Here are some pictures.Avery 'posing' for the camera

Cayden is happy

They're adorable when they're sleeping

What big hands you have

Avery peeks at the camera

Open Wide!

He's way too cheerful in the morning

My morning wake up call

What a cutie!

Y'arr!

I think he's about to sing...

Happy Cayden!

Halloo

2009-10-12T22:31:00.000-07:00

After a two week hiatus, Grasp the Nettle has returned. It was not a deliberate break, life just got in the way. Last week, I was going to update and my computer stopped working for most of a day. Technically it was just the internet that stopped working, but it is hard to load something up on the internet when you can't access the internet. So I didn't.
Today, it is being weird and freezing every once in a while for a few seconds. I think that is because I ran the battery down and it is recharging, but is still pretty low in power. It's not really a big deal.
Finally, an announcement about Thunderfunk the Superchicken. I am going to wrap up that story in the next few weeks. It has been fun to create, but I am busier now than I was before, and it is hard to come up with a new part to one story every week, let alone two, and I have a more concrete plot line for Fools of us All laid out (I know, hard to tell), so I figured I would spend more time finishing that one.
Anyway, that's all I have for now. I will try to update about my Thanksgiving tomorrow or Wednesday (it was good).

I am in shock. Or at least mildly surprised.

2009-10-03T22:35:00.000-07:00

We may have the coolest prime minister ever. Okay, he's still a bit of a dork, but he can sing not bad, and apparently play the piano...

Titular Posting

2009-09-24T22:29:00.000-07:00

Someone once asked where the title "News from the back (of my mind) came from". A few years back I basically started a blog, but instead of a blog site that people came to visit, it was a series of emails I sent out that were, to me, intended to explore a bit of who I was. I would basically journal about a subject or concept or idea and send it out to people. I don't remember how long I did it or who I sent it to. I think I have it saved on my computer somewhere. I should take it out and read it some time, see if it still makes sense. It would be interesting to see how many ways I still agree with myself and how I disagree.
Anyway, I sent out these emails and didn't want to just have a lame subject line, so I started calling them 'News from the back (of my mind)'. It was suggested, or at least part of it was, by Peter. I think he suggested the first part (news from the back) because I tended to sit at the back of classrooms, so it seemed fitting (correct me if I'm wrong Peter)(or affirm me if I am right)(or just take the credit if you can't remember). I added the part in brackets. I don't know why, it just seemed fitting.
Then when I started this blog, it just seemed like an appropriate name.
The real question is, does anyone know why I am calling my story blog Grasp the Nettle? Does anyone know what that is a reference to?
Tell me what you think.

Shorty

2009-09-22T10:28:00.000-07:00

I have updated Fools of us All.
That is all I have to say.

Gas Station Thought

2009-09-17T23:08:00.000-07:00

I was at a gas station today and a car pulled up at the same time that made me sad. It was a nice new BMW convertible. But I had seen it driving just before and it had made me nervous. The front of my car was even with the back bumper of the car in the lane beside me, and this BMW accelerates past me and slows down inches away from the car in front of it. I was on my brakes as soon as I heard his engine speeding up because I knew there wasn't room for him to change lanes and there wasn't room to be accelerating (even though he was) and I didn't want to be caught up in an accident.
Once we were both in the gas station, a couple of young guys jumped out (there were a couple other people in the car - one was a woman for sure...I didn't see them, just heard them). They were shouting to each other, yelling very crude things and laughing. They turned on their very impressive stereo very loud and everything about their attitude made me sad.
I don't know these people. I don't know who they are, what they think about anything, how they act - I just have a two minute perspective, but everything about how they presented themselves made me think that they didn't care about anything besides having fun and living for themselves.
It makes me sad that so many people get caught up in that, and I always hope that I am not one of them, but sometimes I worry that I am. All I want from my life is to be able to love others and to help, and it saddens me to think that there are people who would think I am weak or less than they are for that reason.
That was my gas station thought.

Grasp the Nettle

Spanish Radio

2009-09-15T22:13:00.000-07:00

I will listen to the sports radio station here in Calgary quite often, especially when I am driving around late at night. I like to have something that is not music playing sometimes, and I am a bit of a sports nut too, so it's interesting to hear what they think about various sports stories, though I don't care much about betting, college sports, basketball, or the NFL, so there are many times when I basically ignore what they are saying.
In the evening, they just pick up the American sports radio shows from ESPN, so it is all focused on the US, which is why there is so much college and so little hockey and no CFL whatsoever. And every once in a while they have a Spanish update. But they never really announce it or explain it. They will just suddenly wrap up what they are saying, and then a voice that has such a thick Mexican accent that he is nearly unintelligible will begin to talk about soccer (I think...I can't really understand him). Every time I hear this, I get uncomfortable because it sounds like they are doing some sort of bad comedy routine where they are basically making fun of Mexicans. The accent is so thick and stereotypical that I have trouble believing that it is serious. But it is! And it doesn't make any sense to me.
I think they have a Spanish language (Mexican language?) sports station, and I think this soccer moment is a cross-promotion for that station, but they never say anything about the other station. If they want people to listen to the Spanish station, why do they make the guy speak in English and then not tell anyone about the Spanish station? If they think people are interested in soccer, why not have someone give the updates in English that is less accented. It is not good business for radio stations to put people on who are hard to understand. It is not just somewhat difficult, like he has a light accent. That's not so bad. Many sports players have accents but are still understandable. This guy makes it hard to drive because I have to concentrate so hard on what he is saying that I almost drive off of the road.
And the worst part is, I'm not sure if I can laugh about it or not. Would that make me racist?

Anyway, I updated Grasp the Nettle. It's a little late, I know. Sorry about that.

Rant ads

2009-09-12T09:17:00.000-07:00

I know I talk about ads quite often. I just find them fascinating. To me, most commercials aren't about selling product. They are more a reflection on the time and place and values of the time and place where the commercial is produced. I rarely see commercials apart from their societal message, if you will.
For example, there is an ad out for Kokanee beer right now that makes me a little sad. It is filmed from a first person perspective and it shows a guy going through a couple of days in a fast forward time lapse. Everything he does in those two days is devoted to fun and his own self-interests. He goes out and skis and kayaks and bikes down a mountain and then goes to a party and wakes up the next morning with a young woman in his bed and then goes out and does all sorts of fantastic things, ending the night at another party full of pretty girls and he catches the eye of one of them, implying that he is going to try and pick her up next. All I can think when I see that ad is how empty a life like that would be and how pointless. It's not that I have anything against most of what he does - skiing can be fun, as can whitewater rafting and mountain biking. But this ad isn't selling beer so much as it is trying to sell a lifestyle, and, as I said, I find that lifestyle empty in the end. Maybe I have just known too many people who have nothing in their life that really seems to matter - they just concentrate on working enough to fund their toys and that is all they care about. The ad is merely reflecting and helping to reinforce that state of mind. Canada and the US are two of the richest countries in the world, and sometimes I think we are also among the most dissatisfied.
Well, this got more depressing than I thought it would. Maybe working in retail has made me more sensitive to how pointless much of the wants of this world are. The amount of money and energy spent on things makes me sad.
So on a bit more of an upbeat note...okay, that's a lie. It's more of a funny/grumpy old man note. The current ads for PCs amuse me. They show young kids, four to six years old, doing things that sound complicated. They are trying to say that PCs are so much easier than Macs (though they never actually mention Macs, just using the phrase "I'm a PC" brings to mind the Mac vs PC ads). However, the fact that a four year old can use the PC is not a measure of how easy the PC is to use as much as it is saying that when someone grows up with something and uses it from an early age, it becomes second nature. If those same kids were raised in a family of Mac users, they would find the Macs to be much more intuitive. I remember finding PCs odd to use at first because the few computers I had experience with when I was young were all Macs. But I have not used Macs much since then, so they are a bit odd (the whole 'one button mouse' thing is a little weird now). It shows that ads are less about informing about products and more about selling ideas.

Grasp the Nettle

Yikes

2009-09-10T22:28:00.001-07:00

Frightening...or maybe just sad.

Auto Tune the News

2009-09-04T18:15:00.000-07:00

To quote Dave Barry: "Best use of technology ever!"

I will be updating Thunderfunk the Superchicken tonight or tomorrow night. In case you were wondering.

This Came Outta Nowhere

2009-08-31T23:35:00.001-07:00

Disney buys Marvel! It's a good business move and since both companies are strong right now, there should be no major changes.
Until Howard the Duck meets Donald Duck. Then heads will roll...
And pants sales will plummet.
I can't wait for the first Spider-Man/Mickey Mouse crossover. Shudder.

Grasp the Nettle

Good Beats

2009-08-29T16:36:00.001-07:00

Percussion Trakter

Germs are slow

2009-08-28T18:05:00.000-07:00

I like visiting websites and watching shows and reading stories that talk about urban legends and myths. Mythbusters is a great show (especially since they love to blow stuff UP). I get regular weekly updates from www.snopes.com. I am very skeptical about many stories I hear until I get some sort of confirmation.
But I don't understand why these people insist on testing the 'five second rule'. Does anyone truly believe that picking food up from the ground within five (or ten) seconds will mean that it cannot get dirty? People say that when they want to eat the food that just fell on the floor. Some folks are too concerned about germs to consider eating food that fell on the floor for even a second, while others (like myself) aren't usually too concerned.
I think it only bugs me because whoever tests this 'rule' seems to take it completely seriously with no mention of it being a silly thing that people say. It is forcing me to think that I am the only one who says it without actually meaning it. No, no. It's the others who are wrong.

Grasp the Nettle

Newbie

2009-08-24T22:33:00.000-07:00

I am getting a new manager at my store this week. One of our other stores has been without a manager for a few months, so they decided that my manager would be a good fit there and so off she went today. I have not met the new guy yet, but apparently he is pretty good.
I feel like I should be stressed about this, but I am not feeling that at all. There is nothing I can do, and I think I'm doing a good job (when I remember to lock the doors at night), so I don't have anything to worry about.
I just hope he doesn't come in with a chip on his shoulder and try to change everything. That would be nice.

Also, Fools of us All.

Sniffle

2009-08-20T23:23:00.001-07:00

I don't like getting sick. I get all whiny and stuff. Can someone make me better? Or make me sick enough that I don't have to go to work? I'm tired and hungry, but I don't feel good.
I don't like getting sick.

Grasp the Nettle

I like candy

2009-08-18T12:17:00.000-07:00

So my girlfriend (Beth) went to the Philippines for two weeks. When she came back, she brought me candy. I think she is trying to fatten me up. I'm okay with that.
Mmm...candy.

Also, Fools of us all.

Tired

2009-08-13T23:57:00.001-07:00

I'm sleepy, so today's edition of Thunderfunk the Superchicken is pretty short. It's still amusing, though.

I'm just scratching, I swear

2009-08-11T21:59:00.000-07:00

At some point near the end of the camping trip, I think I got a mosquito bite on my nose. A small red bump began to form and then I spent all day today going mad because my nose was itchy. Everywhere on my nose was itchy. The whole thing.
Lousy mosquito.

We camp good!

2009-08-10T22:12:00.000-07:00

Well, just got back from my annual camping trip. It was some good times. We hung out in Banff, went to the hot springs, golfed, watched G.I. Joe (a silly yet entertaining movie), played games and just chatted. We may not be rugged campers, but that's not really the point now, is it? I think we all come away from this weekend feeling tired (from lack of sleep), but also rejuvenated and refreshed.
I do have to say, though, that as the only unmarried guy in a group of seven men, I think I should have had a bed to myself because I am not used to sharing a bed. Oh yeah, we were in a cabin this year, so there were three double beds (technically two double beds and a fouton couch thingy)(and an air mattress). I did not sleep well all weekend. I am going to go to bed now.
You, on the other hand, should probably read the next chapter of Fools of us All. I wrote it especially for you.

It's almost like a personal ad.

2009-07-31T18:39:00.000-07:00

I just found out my roommate is moving out at the end of August, so if anyone knows of someone looking for a place starting September 1st, let me know.

Well watered

2009-07-30T23:09:00.000-07:00

I gave blood yesterday and I drank so much water during the day to keep myself well hydrated that I ended up going to the bathroom once an hour during the evening. And I had to go so bad that it was almost painful. I think I kept myself well hydrated.
The reason I felt this was so important was because when I gave blood a few years ago, I didn't drink much water afterward and it was not good. I was in my parents basement and I had to use the bathroom, so I ran upstairs and, as Bill Cosby said, started doing the Lord's business. As I finished, everything suddenly got real dark and then I found myself laying on the floor, which was odd because I had been standing the last I remembered. I think mom must have heard me fall because she called out to see if I was all right, and I said I was.
Mom, if you're reading this - I fainted. I was all right, just in a fainty sort of way.
So now I drink plenty of water.

Grasp the Nettle

The stories are all true. Except for that one, you sicko.

2009-07-27T23:13:00.001-07:00

For anyone who hasn't yet heard, yes I am dating now. Her name is Beth. I met her at my small group. She is smart, funny, pleasantly sarcastic, serious about God, and frankly I don't know why she would want to date me.
Maybe it's my hair.
We started dating on my birthday, which was cool. We had small group the next night, and then she had tickets for the Folk Festival which she had bought months ago, and today (Tuesday) she is leaving to the Philippines for two weeks. Eventually I'll get to hang out with her I hope :)

Grasp the Nettle

Cheese it, it's the fuzz!

2009-07-23T23:14:00.000-07:00

There is an officer in Calgary who has an accent that sounds like it is from somewhere in the United Kingdom, but I could not quite figure out where it was from. It was definitely not a classic, stereotypical British accent, but it seemed to me to be an accent of a native English speaker, and not someone who started with another language.
How do I know this, you ask? Well, I met that officer today. I also met many of his colleagues as well. Very nice men. I've always liked the red stripe on the side of the police pants. It somehow makes their uniforms much cooler looking.
I went to the airport today to pick up Peter (Peter Ralph, in case y'all were wondering) because he is going to the indy race in Edmonton but it was significantly cheaper for him to fly to Calgary and drive to Edmonton. So I picked him up and we headed to his sister and brother-in-law's house so that he could borrow their car. They were out of town for the night, so they had given Pete their security code and house key.
We got there and entered the house. The alarm system is odd in that you have to enter the code into the phone. The cordless phone. The cordless phone that had been left sitting on the TV cabinet so that it was easy to find. The cordless phone that was now completely dead. So all we could do was nothing. After a minute or two, the alarm proceeded to ring. The security company then did their live talk to us thing that they do. Peter somehow understood what the disembodied voice was saying (I had no idea) and gave them the code. The security dude seemed satisfied and said goodbye. A few seconds later, a pleasant female voice said "Alarm set" and there was a beeping sound. The beeping was regular, and after a bit it sped up until it stopped. A minute of silence was followed by the blaring alarm.
The disembodied voice sounded again, apparently wanting us to answer the phone. Peter told them that the whole reason we were having troubles was because the phone was dead. A movement on the lawn caught my attention.
A few seconds later, we opened the door and headed outside, putting our hands where the officers could see them. We explained ourselves and they seemed pretty calm, which was good. They took our licenses, which was fine because that is their job. They also headed inside and checked out the house just to be sure. During all of this, the alarm went off a couple of more times, each time resetting itself immediately after.
I counted eight officers at least (and later one of them mentioned that there had been more in the back alley that we never saw). I thought that was a bit excessive until the tenant in the basement suite headed upstairs and mentioned that he had called the police because he heard voices and footsteps upstairs. Apparently he had grabbed his largest, sharpest knife and then called 9-1-1. I guess a call like that (he didn't mention his knife, but he did mention the fact that someone had broke in to the upstairs) gets high priority, and it was a slow night.
Eventually, the cops headed off to the rest of their evenings. We finally got our licenses back. Apparently their system says that I surrendered my license a while back so that I could go to Germany. The funny thing is, though I did do just that, when I got back I did everything they told me I needed to do to get my license back in Canada. Apparently no one told the computers, though, so I now have to go get that whole situation figured out.
Yay.
Life with Peter is just odd.

Grasp the Nettle

And Yet I Don't Like Pasta Salads

2009-07-20T22:00:00.000-07:00

On Sunday for lunch I ate cold macaroni for lunch. The reason I ate cold macaroni was because my microwave died so I could not heat up my leftover macaroni. Actually, the reason I ate cold macaroni was because I had already pulled it out of the fridge and taken the lid off of the container before I remembered that my microwave was broken. My options at that point were to put the lid back onto the container and then put it back in the fridge, or to eat it anyway. I figured the second option was fewer steps so it made the most sense.
It takes alot of work to be that lazy, I'll tell you what.

Grasp the Nettle

Some Thoughts

2009-07-16T19:15:00.000-07:00

Nike's ad for their golf ball shows many different players using their ball and wearing their logo and the music, shots, and text all imply that the winners use Nike. But what I see is that Nike has an awful lot of players using their ball and losing every week. I don't think I'll use their ball to golf.

I'm eating a pizza with corn on it. It's chipotle chicken, so it has chicken and a cream sauce and is spicy and quite tasty. Also, it has corn.

The BC Lions and Edmonton Eskimos are playing football against each other. If Edmonton wins, then BC is 0-3 on the season and Edmonton is 2-1. I like BC being at 0-3, but if the Roughriders lose on Saturday, then they would be tied at 2-1 with Edmonton. But if BC wins, then they are at 1-2, Edmonton is at 1-2, and the Roughriders will be in first place even if they lose, so that is good.

I still want BC to lose.

3 of the last 4 Grey Cup champions were coached by rookie coaches.

Taylor's golf ball ads admits that they aren't the number one ball in golf. Then they say they are better. But they're still not number one, so why would I want to go with a brand that isn't the best. If they aren't the number one ball, how can I believe they are so good. Just because they say so? I don't think so. I won't be using their golf balls either.

Today has felt like Friday all day. But it's only Thursday. So sad.

Bah.

At some point I heard a news story saying that the World Health Organisation or the Centre for Disease Control (or whoever deals with pandemics) wanted everyone to stop referring to H1N1 as swine flu because it was harmful to the pork industry and was innacurate. Since then I have only read one story that did not mention swine flu. Most stories say something about "H1N1 virus, formerly caled swine flu" or something like that. By now, pretty much everyone should know that H1N1 used to be called swine flu. It makes me think that the people who write the news have a very low opinion of people's intelligence.

Sometimes I think they are right.

The more I see Kraft's Mayonnaise ad, the angrier it makes me. How does mayonnaise make you cool? It just doesn't make sense.

If I don't specifically care about two teams playing in a game, I usually cheer for the home team because then the crowd will be into it and an excited crowd sounds better.

An ad for the Keg suddenly made me think of Christmas, and I'm not ready for Christmas yet. Oddly, it was a lobster that made me think of Christmas. Yeah, I can't explain that one either.

BC won.

Now go check out Grasp the Nettle.

Update: I'm tired. I'll update the Nettle tomorrow.

Update update: It's been updated.

Links

2009-07-13T22:34:00.000-07:00

I heard a cover of Toto's Africa recently. I can't say much for the cover, but, man, do I ever enjoy the original.
Also, I updated Fools of us All.
Enjoy.

It's True.

2009-07-12T23:09:00.001-07:00

If everyone tells you NOT to give in to peer pressure, what do you do?

2009-07-12T14:47:00.000-07:00

I have had people tell me that I should go into marketing, and while I can't speak to the wisdom of such a choice, I can tell you the chances of it ever happening - almost none.
I admit, there is some intrigue in the idea of marketing. The potential for creativity is highly possible. Plus, as you may already know, I spend much of my time analyzing ads (and not just on TV - print ads and billboards are interesting as well) and I have to admit that I sometimes rework the ads in my head to better (at least, I think better) represent the products and hit the target audience.
A few facets of marketing continue to fascinate me. One is that everyone, myself included, continues to fall for it. Marketing is little more than hype. Facts are not clearly presented, if they are presented at all, and the goal of the marketing is to get people to buy a lifestyle that never really materialises once the purchase is made. The worst part is that most people know this and still continue as if they did not.
And then there comes the issue that is contradictory and yet accepted by most everyone: the idea of individuality by being part of a group, along with the notion that for most products, individuality is the last thing the company wants. For example, right now Miracle Whip has an ad campaign that features many people 'being themselves' and 'not conforming'. And if you want to be part of this group, you should buy Miracle Whip because it will not...be like...other...mayonnaises...? The ad doesn't even make sense when you actually look at it because it has nothing to do with mayonnaise. The ad revolves around people being themselves, showing images of those who aren't part of the 'five-to-nine', wear a suit to work, boring lifestyle. In the same way (?), Miracle Whip is not your father's boring mayonnaise, but it is the choice of free spirits and individual thinkers everywhere, so to be individual like them, do the same thing they do. You see the problem: in order to be an individual, you must do the same thing as other people. And if you aren't, then you are boring and just cut out of a cookie cutter. But if everyone buys the same product, then is that still being an individual? And how on God's green earth can mayonnaise make me...cooler, or more hip, or fly-er, or whatever the current slang for individualistic and unique (that everyone uses) is. It can't. And yet the commercial tries to convince me otherwise.
And it is the same with most products. No one wants to follow the crowd or be the same as everyone else, especially teenagers (more on that in a minute), so advertisers try to make everything seem cool, new, and fresh, and it is a mark of honour to be different and even weird. But the problem is, if a company is advertising you to buy their stuff, they don't want you to be an individual - they want you to buy their stuff, and then for you to get your friends to buy their stuff because that is how they make money, which is their goal. I'm not trying to be cynical here, I am just saying that most companies exist to make money, which makes sense because the people who work at these companies and who own these companies like to do things like eat and live in houses. And it is normal (though perhaps not beneficial) to want to have a great deal of money, so businesses want to be successful by selling more products. If everyone was truly individualistic like the commercials implied, then there would be way more companies, and each company would make less money because fewer people would buy from them.
The real paradoxical thing is the notion of wanting to be an individual, especially among teenagers. Teenagers want to fit in. They want to be part of a peer group and they don't want to be laughed at or thought of as different. Social cliques exist for a reason - a true individual, meaning someone who is different than everyone, is looked upon with disdain and distrust by everyone, and when you are fifteen, that is one of the most painful experiences possible. Gangs are successful and grow because they make kids feel like they have a family, even if being in that family can easily lead to prison or death, it is worth it because in that group, the teen feels like they belong.
And yet no teenager would ever admit to wanting to be part of the norm, to be nothing more than a cog in a machine. They want to be themselves, their own person, unique and special. They find a group that makes them feel that way and look down on everyone else for being part of another group because the other people are just following the herd while their group is breaking the mold, is successful, is popular, is whatever they feel they are. It is a paradox because the individual joins a group to be more of an individual than they can be on their own.
It is not just teenagers that experience such feelings. Even in adulthood people seek to belong while bemoaning anything that forces them to conform. It is a bizarre phenomenon to see. The most interesting part is how many people recognise this aspect in other people but don't acknowledge it in their own lives. I know I usually can't, though sometimes I look around at my world and situation and wonder.
The other part of marketing I would struggle with is trying to convince people to buy crap they don't need. "Hey, you there? Is your car still working fine? Yes? But is it brand new? No? That's too bad, because other people have brand new cars and that must mean they are more successful than you. Of course, if you buy this car, then people will know you are a successful stud muffin. That's right, come down and buy our car and people will like you better. Now dance for me puppet. Dance." That's basically what I hear when I watch commercials. I just can't do it.
Monty Python made a movie called Life of Brian. In that movie, some first century (around 30 A.D.) start following a guy named Brian, thinking he is the messiah, despite his protests to the contrary. In a bid to get them to stop following him, he start berating them for blindly following the herd and not thinking for themselves. Rather than listening to his 'sermon', they begin to repeat his words of wisdom without actually listening to them. "You're all individuals!" he says. "Yes," replies the crowd. "We're all individuals." "You're all different!" continues Brian. "We're all different!" repeats the crowd. "I'm not!" comes one lonely voice, only to be shushed by all around him. Who knew the people who brought you vikings singing about spam could be so absurdly profound.
Now, I realise there are a few...issues...that could be found with my arguments here. Not all teenagers are angst ridden attention seekers with self-esteem issues. There's a sixteen year old in Akron, Ohio who is very well adjusted for his age. And I am aware that not all advertising is for useless crap. I really do need a slap chop and a snuggie. And apparently beer will make me sexually virile and unbelievably attractive to the opposite sex. Actually, with enough beer, that last part might actually be true. I guess there is some truth in advertising...
But seriously, I do know that there are worthy causes that need promotion and attention. I'm just not sure if I could stomach to be part of the larger marketing world, even if my little corner is quite tidy and worthy.
But that's just me.
Also, the NFL sucks, but they have the money and the hype, so people think it is a better game. They're wrong.
Just wanted to get that off my chest.

I'm Feeling Reflective (You'll get it in a second)

2009-07-09T21:06:00.001-07:00

Today, while I was watching Ellen...that is to say, while I was working, I heard an interesting tidbit about Kiefer Sutherland: apparently he only has one mirror in his house, located in the bathroom. That's not interesting to me, but everyone on the show seemed shocked. He was questioned extensively about it, though I did not have a chance to hear much of it due to some pesky customers that wanted service for some reason.
I have been pondering this revelation and I'm baffled at the shock and awe it produced. I only have one mirror in my place, and I can't imagine needing more. I know it is common to have one in the bedroom and I can see the value in that, but not so much so that it would be weird to not have it. Anytime I absolutely need the mirror, I'm either already in the bathroom (shaving, for example) or just steps away from the bathroom, so having one in my room isn't necessary. And I can't think of a reason to have one in a room besides a bedroom or bathroom except for decoration, and not having a decorative mirror shouldn't be a shock to anyone.
Sometimes I wonder if I'm living my life in a very unusual manner, or I'm closer to normal than I realise, but I never hear about the norm because the norm isn't newsworthy.
To end on an amusing note - when I lived in Germany, I was living in a dorm room with an attached bathroom, and I had three mirrors including the bathroom mirror. At least three mirrors, it may have been four. I can't remember if there was one on the back of the door. But in my defence, they were all there when I arrived, so it's not like I planned it that way.

I've been to Winnipeg before...

2009-07-07T20:19:00.000-07:00

All right, first of all, I feel much better today. I got less sleep last night and I think that was key.
So, Portland. I have a friend (Christine) whose parents live in Portland (yes, Oregon), so some of us decided to go on a road trip. We left after work on Thursday and drove for twelve hours, arriving at six in the morning. We had a nap (the others slept for six or seven hours, but I woke up after three and a half and couldn't sleep, so I sat around for a while and chatted with her parents) and then we went to the beach. It was the second time I had visited my mortal enemy: the Pacific Ocean. The first time we met, it attacked me without provocation, despite my attempts at following established protocol and convention, thus setting the stage for our epic struggle.
The beach was good. The sun was shining, which I guess is not a guarantee, and it wasn't terribly cold. I had never been to a beach, at least an ocean one, and I think I see the appeal. There was a fog that had settled onto the far reaches of the beach, leaving the giant stone formations that jutted out here and there shadowed in mist, which I thought was cool. I like fog. We hung around for a while, walking up and down the beach, dipping our toes in the water and just having some fun.
So it was with bemusement and a newfound respect that I realised the Pacific had changed his tactics to attacks with a more subtle, psychological bent. I shall have to be more wary in the future if I am to prevail. This is not over...not by a long shot.
The next day we got up late again (I like having days off) and went to walk around the open air Saturday market in downtown Portland near the river. It was interesting to see. We also visited a book store where I bought four books, which was the extent of my spending on the trip (besides food and gas). Later that night we went for a hike up a mountain...okay, we just walked halfway up a hill (from the parking lot halfway up to the top) where there was a good view of some mountains around the area. We could see Mt. St. Helens. from there and...other...hills. After that we went back to Christine's house and sat in her front yard watching the neighbours set off fireworks (it was the fourth of July) and other, larger displays, though we couldn't see much due to the copious number of trees in the area. At one point a police car drove down the street and had to drive around the fireworks that were going off on the street, and he didn't even slow down. The US is a weird place. Then we sat in the back yard and played cards and had s'mores.
That was my weekend trip to Portland. It is quite a beautiful place with plenty of trees, which I like. I think I like tree covered hills as much as, and likely more than, huge rocky mountains, as cool as those are.
Also, it is odd to me to see cellists playing in street clothes.

I'm home

2009-07-06T21:56:00.000-07:00

Normally I would update Grasp the Nettle today. Last week I didn't, largely because I was going to be out of town on Friday and I try to keep both stories on the same schedule. Today, I'm just not up to it. The weekend was good, but since I got back I've been listless and apathetic, and I'm not sure why. I'm just...disinterested. I don't like this feeling.

Goin' to Winnipeg.

2009-07-02T15:25:00.001-07:00

I mean Portland. I'm going to Portland.

It Tickled Me

2009-06-29T23:09:00.000-07:00

I was sitting in church on Sunday and I noticed someone sitting a few rows up who looked awfully familiar, but as that person was living elsewhere, I knew it could not be him. But it kept bugging me every time I saw him. Later in the service I moved to the very back of the gym for audio reasons. When the service was over and everyone was walking about, I saw this person again and I found myself staring because he really looked like someone that he could not be. He noticed me staring and...
It turns out, one of the RAs I worked with in Germany happened to be in Calgary for the wedding of someone who attends my church. Now let me tell you how weird it was to see him there. First of all, the school year barely ended, so he has been back in North America for less than two weeks. Second of all, he is not from Calgary. Third, he is not from Canada. He is from the state of Washington. Fourth, my church has five services every week over three different sites, so even knowing someone from my church does not guarantee I would see him if he visited. And yet here he was. It was a moment of sureality.
We didn't have much time to chat and couldn't spend any more time together, but it was still good to see him. The weirdest part, I think, was when he introduced me to people that attend my church. He's not even from the same country and he introduces me to people I worship with every week. God enjoyed setting this one up, I'm sure.

I Can Be As Cranky As Scott When I Want To Be

2009-06-26T18:39:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I get tired of 'blonde jokes', and 'ethnic jokes' and the such. Most of those types of jokes would be just as funny if it was about 'a person' instead of a specific ethnicity or group. That's not to say they are terribly funny to start with, usually worth a grin or a small laugh if it has not been heard before. Changing 'blonde' to 'person' is usually fine...that being said, if done ironically or self-referentially or with an obvious attempt a broad, lame humour (where the lameness of the joke is the joke), then I don't mind gender related jokes, but even then, it has to be done right...Michael Jackson has died, and I find that it hasn't affected me beyond rolling my eyes at how many people are so deeply pained by this person's death - a person whom they have never met...it is sad that he died so young, but truthfully, much of his life has been sad for a long time...just a further testament to the detriment fame can have on people...especially when they become famous so young...sometimes I wonder if he ever had a real friend in his life...and the obsession with celebrity is getting worse...if Perez Hilton can become famous enough to be at big awards shows because he blogs about celebrities then I say that celebrity watching is getting out of hand...it is such a nasty world of rumours and smack talk that I don't know how anyone can survive in that world...I have huge respect for those who can avoid controversy and remain faithful to their partner...the number of people on that list is depressingly small...Johnny Depp seems to be pretty good at not being dragged through the mud...Bono too, though many people have been finding him rather smug and self-important lately...(at least he's trying to help instead of spending his time getting drunk and boozing it up with young girls)...I do find it interesting that the obsession with celebrity is not a recent development...as long as there have been movies, there have been obsessed fans who needed to know everything about them...and there have been people who have been unable to handle the pressures put on them...that doesn't make it right, though...and I do think it is getting worse...I didn't have anything in specific that I wanted to share on my last post, it just felt like I did...I think I was just tired...Transformers 2 was pretty good, though they tried to have too many funny moments...that seems to be a common theme in action sequels...everyone likes the moments of levity in action movies and movies can get too intense without them, but too many and it ruins the mood...Jar Jar Binks sucked...I don't like Twitter either...I'm doing an online/correspondence writing course right now and I got my first assignment back on Wednesday...I couldn't make myself open it and read the comments until this afternoon...I was convinced that the teacher would hate it...this is what I go through every time I think of writing something...and this is what I go through everytime I show someone my writing...luckily, the teacher liked it, though she did have a few suggestions...so that was cool...I think 'everytime' should be one word, but it seems it is two...curse you, English language, you'll accept 'grrl', but not 'everytime'..."If you had all the gold ever mined in the history of man, you could build a little more than half of Devastator"...most random movie fact I have ever heard...I'm finally reading the Harry Potter books...haven't had a decent night's sleep since I started reading them...they're pretty good...I'm on the fifth one...Harry gets falsely accused of something in the fifth book and I found myself getting angry at the injustice of it all...kudos, Ms. Rowling, kudos...I know I'm a day or two late, but I updated Grasp the Nettle today...and I'm out!

Uncertainty. Snore.

2009-06-22T21:28:00.000-07:00

You ever have a day where you feel like you have something to say, but you're not sure what, or how to say it? That's how I feel right now.
Well, that and tired.
Go. Read.

Matchless

2009-06-21T12:56:00.000-07:00

I bought some socks yesterday. It says there were six pairs of socks in the package, or so it said. But when I opened them, I found that there were only five and a half pairs of socks. If I ever paired my socks together, I would be upset, I suppose. But I just grab socks from the drawer and put them on, not really caring if they are matching. Of course, since all of my socks are white, most people don't notice.
Also, every time I wrote the word 'socks', I first typed 'sox'. Weird, eh?

There's No Iron, Either

2009-06-18T22:42:00.000-07:00

You know what I don't get? Why do food labels include items that are not actually in the food. For example: my milk list the amounts and percentages of different nutritional facts which it contains. There are 130 calories. There are five grams of fat, which is 8% of my recommended daily value. There is 140mg of sodium, which is 6% of my daily value, and also somewhat surprising to me. And then it tells me that there are 0 grams of fibre, which is 0% of my daily need. Why do they need to tell me that there is not something in the milk? I can understand, somewhat, if they are telling me there is no lead or arsenic in the milk, though that would make me suspicious of any milk that failed to say it was lead free, but that is a thought for another day. But if there is nothing of a mineral or whatever in the product, why do we need to know? Do people really assume that there is something in the food because it is not on the lable?
Although, I did hear about a woman who tried to sue a cereal company because she felt they had committed fraud by falsely advertising their product as being real fruit when it was not. The cereal was Captain's Crunchberries. The 'fruit' 'shaped' pieces on the box were labelled as being enhanced to show texture, or something that basically said that the picture was not accurate. Also, she had been buying them for four years. So I guess people need the blindingly obvious pointed out to them sometimes.
Well check out the next chapter.

P.S. The judge threw the case out of court, in case you were wondering.

It's all true.

2009-06-15T23:32:00.000-07:00

Today, I ran out of clean clothing. I had to wear dress socks after work because that was all I had left. Perhaps I should do laundry more often...perhaps indeed.
Go here.

God does answer prayer

2009-06-11T21:23:00.000-07:00

On Monday my manager was not at work. Over the weekend her ex-father-in-law had died. Though she is no longer married to her (obviously) ex-husband, she was still close to his family, so this was a bit of bad news. The funeral was on Monday, which explained her absence. She had, however, come in early in the morning to finish up a couple of things, and while she was there, or so I was told, she had been in a bit of a crabby mood (which is understandable). This is not the first time she has been somewhat grouchy, and when she is it can be difficult at the store. She is a very demanding lady (which is not usually a bad thing).
Monday was a weird day - it was unusually busy, especially given the weather conditions (cool and cloudy, and then rainy), and none of us there were completely into the day. It was like we were all in neutral, revving our engines but not getting anywhere. Some time after noon, I had a guy come in and order some five gallon pails of paint and two single gallons. We were busy, I was a bit distracted, I didn't write anything down, and he left after ordering it, planning on returning for it in a while. I did the two single gallon pails of paint and then I did the five gallon pails. As I was finishing them and putting them at the front to be picked up, it suddenly occurred to me that I had done both five gallon pails of paint completely wrong. I was supposed to put ten drops of black into them so that they would be just slightly off white. Instead, I put ten ounces of black in them. For the record, an ounce is made up of 48 drops (at least it does for our purposes). I then had to make another five gallon pail of paint with the correct amount and the five gallon pails were a write-off, which looks bad for me and hurts the store's bottom line. Later, I mis-tinted another single gallon pail. It was a great day (where's the sarcasm font? I need a sarcasm font!)
On Tuesday, I was worried about going to work. I wasn't sure if things would be okay or if I would get home for the day (and every day after as well). I was quite certain that Tuesday was going to be worse than Monday, and I really did not want to go to work. As I drove there I was getting more and more worried. Finally I prayed a serious prayer, asking God to grant me mercy. I was willing to accept the consequences of what I did, but I was praying that the consequences would not include being fired.
I get to work and, to my surprise, everyone is in a pretty good mood, even my manager. I decide to not mention the five gallon pails, at least not for a while. As the day goes, things are great. It was really slow (which is not great), but there was no frustrations or anger and tension or anything. Finally I am pulled into the office for a chat. I close the door and sit down, wondering what my punishment would be, wondering just how close I was to the end. She sits down, looks at me and very seriously offers to put me on full time, which includes benefits and vacation time, and even a possible raise. My brain rubbed its eyes and looked around nervously, wondering if my ears were playing a trick on it. For their part, my ears just shrugged and told my brain that they didn't make up the news, they merely reported it, which is not always true, but in this case they were right. She said that she was pleased with my effort and had contacted our district manager to tell him of her recommendation, and that he had agreed. I guess he was a little surprised because my manager is so demanding - for her to praise an employee so highly is somewhat unusual.
Wednesday was a normal day, nothing to report.
Today, our district manager came in and talked to me, basically repeating everything I had already been told. But him saying so makes it official, so that was cool. I decided to celebrate by not closing the lid on a gallon of paint and then putting it in the shaker. And when I say paint, I mean oil stain, so it was lots of fun to clean up (seriously, what is the most sarcastic font out there?). Apparently I cannot be told good news...
The full time/benefits/etc thing won't actually kick in until January or February as the budget for this year is frozen and nothing like this can be added to it. But when they do the budget for next year, I will be written in so it will be set in stone. Soft stone, as anything can be changed, but stone nonetheless. I don't know if I've ever been part of a budget like that before. It's pretty cool.
Anyhoo, that's been my week. I updated Thunderfunk again, in case you were wondering.

More than meets the eye!

2009-06-08T22:34:00.000-07:00

Thoughts from Transformers (the recent movie):

It's a good thing the Transformers learned the driving laws right away. Bad driving would have been a dead give away...on second thought, I bet they never learned the rules and no one noticed.

Michael Bay is very hard on buildings in his movies. It's like he has something against architecture or something.

When the Autobots first show up and reveal themselves to Sam and Mikalea (Megan Fox's character), it's the girl who finally asks them why they came. That's because Sam is almost certainly just wondering if he can use these giant robots to blow stuff up or pick up girls. Ah, who am I kidding...if he can use these giant robots to blow stuff up and pick up girls.

I'm pretty sure that an entire scene was planned out so that they could have a rough-and-tumble army guy yell out "Left cheek! Left cheek! Left cheek!" Of course, he is referring to his buttock.

It was worth the effort.

Now that GM has filed for bankruptcy, what will that mean for the autobots? They were all Chevs, except for Optimus Prime. Does this mean that the next Transformers movie won't actually feature any autobots? The actors will just refer to the characters like they were actually there but the cars will never be shown? Or will bumblebee suddenly be a Toyota Prius?

Michael Bay isn't so great at subtlty. See Optimus' Prime speach an hour and a half into the movie. And yet, he is still much better the George Lucas. See Star Wars Episode Four. And Episode Five. And Episode Six.

The army is keeping a hostile alien robot underneath the Hoover Dam. They claimed there was no credible threat. I say, THEY HAD A HOSTILE ALIEN ROBOT!

Best quote to describe the movie: "Films directed by Michael Bay are usually like being shouted at by a halfwit for two and a half hours, and Transformers is no exception." (Wendy Ide, 2007)

"I'm gonna count to five."
"Well I'm gonna count to three." And then he points a gun at the other man's chest. Yeah, counting to three wins.

Semi-trucks pulling 180s at high speed on the highway is really cool.

Are transformers vulnerable while they transform? Can they stop halfway and defend themselves somehow? Once they start, do they have to change forms or can the change their minds and stop?

"Sam, put the cube in my chest, now!" That line, within the context of the movie, makes sense. It also makes me slightly uncomfortable for reasons I cannot say.

I still say it was a fun movie.

Robotnick

2009-06-03T17:01:00.000-07:00

Many movies that feature robots with artificial intelligence often make the robots look very metalic and robot-ty. For example, C3PO is vaguely humanoid, but his mouth doesn't move and he is made of metal. R2D2 is a garbage can on wheels. The robots in I, Robot are humanoid and have nearly human faces, but they are obviously robots.
Other robots are presented as looking entirely human on the outside even though they are not. Data from Star Trek the Next Generation looks human (completely white, like he was an albino, but still human) and some robots in the movie Screamers (based on a Philip K. Dick short story, in case you were wondering) were basically indistinguishable from humans.
My question is, would it be easier to accept these creations as being intelligent and nearly human if they looked human or if they looked inhuman. C3PO has a personality and isn't looked upon as though he were a simple machine like a computer or car. He is treated as a person. But I am wondering if that would be hard for people to accept because he looks so inhuman. Would people reject him or find him disconcerting because his face didn't move and he was made of metal?
And conversely, would people find it too easy to accept a robot like Data as being a person and having personality because he looked so human. Would he get respect that he did not deserve if he was less sophisticated than C3PO just because he looked more human? What are people able and willing to accept?
Do I have too much time on my hands?

What's the Real Question

2009-05-31T22:04:00.000-07:00

During my freshman year at college I went to a debate at the University of Regina on Evolution vs. Creation. The actual debate part of the debate was fairly friendly, but not too great. Both sides were a bit weak. At the end the floor was opened for questions. There were not many questions. Most people got up and tearfully told the evolutionist that no matter what he said he was not going to tear down the faith of those who believe, and basically calling him an evil person. That fundamentally disturbed me, and I think about it often with great sadness.
Last year, when I was in Germany I read a book that was 'debating' the old earth movement against the new earth movement (people who believe the earth is millions of years old, even if God created it vs people who think the earth is only a few thousand years old). I say 'debate' because it was written from a pro young earth point of view. The book was very scornful towards the old earthers, even attacking them for being unable to explain a certain point and for saying that they did not yet have an answer. Later in the book, when discussing the young earth position, the author mentioned an issue that the young earth position could not explain, but people were certainly exploring the issue and a reasonable explanation would be found soon. I had to read that twice and then check back in the book to see if I had read it correctly, and I had. Basically, "when they do it, it's wrong. But when I do it, it's okay." By making those two points, he completely invalidated any other argument he had because I couldn't trust him. It was a silly book.
I bring up these issues because of the sermon we heard at church today. We are doing a series called "Ask Anything". People submitted questions and now they are answering them. Last week the question was "Aren't all religions basically the same?" Next week the question is "Does God send people to hell even if they have never even heard of Jesus?" This weeks was "How can you support creation when there is so much science for evolution out there?" The questions are pretty standard.
I really liked what was said today, probably because it is very much what I've thought for a long time. If I could boil it down to one sentence, it would be: God created the world somehow, and now we need to show people His love. He said he had an issue with how christians tended to handle the whole evolution/creation question. The text of Genesis chapter one is a narrative text, not meant to be taken literally necessarily. Even though 'there was evening and there was morning" every day, there was nothing to make the evening or morning (no sun/moon/stars) until halfway through. As he explained it, the narrative was collected to combat the idea that the sun was a god, and the moon was a god, and the wind was a god, and the sky was a god, etc, ideas they had been taught and immersed in when they were slaves in Egypt for hundreds of years.
He also said that when you go to someone and essentially attack their beliefs, they get defensive and try to prove themselves right and other people wrong. It's a natural tendency and everyone falls prey to it. I know I do. But that seems to be the way that christians approach the debate. They get angry and confrontational. They don't try to see the point of view of someone else, but they throw the bible in their faces and point to Genesis one as being literal. There is no attempt to listen, no attempt to understand that many people are brought up believing otherwise and that thinking about someone creating the world instead of it 'just happening' is difficult to do. In the same way, for people brought up in the church, it is amazingly hard to believe that the earth could be millions of years old because that is not what we are taught.
The problem is, how the world was created is not the issue that the Bible talks about. The narrative is concerned with ensuring the reader knows who created the world and that humanity was the peak. God is God: He could do it however He wants. He is outside of time and matter, so we can't constrain Him to creating in seven days. But because christians seem so hellbent on proving the world is young and was created in seven days, they seem to forget to listen, to forget to show people that God loves them and that is why He created the world. That cannot happen when the only question that seems to be raised is how He did it.
Sometimes I think that getting to the truth of the wrong question is as bad as ignoring the truth of the right question.

I Have No Words

2009-05-28T12:51:00.000-07:00

I have never got into American Idol (I maybe watched half of the Reuben season). These people are my opposites. Also, a girl in Number four uses the 'word' 'tremoring'.

I am worried about society.

Ah, rememberies

2009-05-25T21:23:00.000-07:00

I just remembered an assignment I did in elementary school (perhaps in grade five). We were given graph paper and we could draw a picture of anything we wanted. It is possible that it wasn't so much an assignment as it was something to do when I was done my work. Either way, it was definitely graph paper. Oddly enough, that detail is not important at all, but I remember it clearly.
So I started to draw. As a young man, I was naturally drawn to tanks. I drew the barrel of a tank gun at the edge of the paper, like the tank was just too far to the right to be on the page, with a shell being fired from it. I then drew buildings that had been blown up. Across the top of the page I wrote the word "Sarajevo" in large block letters, which I intended to colour in. After I coloured in the 'S', I had a sudden change of heart, deciding that perhaps such a major event was not something to be handled so lightly. So I erased everything.
Everything except that 'S'. It was coloured in with marker. I didn't want to throw out my paper. So instead, I wrote 'San Jose Sharks' across the top of the page and drew a picture of a hockey player in the water. He was so scared that his hockey equipment had come off of him like clothing (and sometimes skin) tends to do in cartoons. His eyes were also bugging out of his head. The reason he was scared was because there was a shark swimming towards him, having already eaten his stick.
I don't know why I remember that.

Early to Bed...?

2009-05-21T21:02:00.000-07:00

I normally work from 9:30 to 6:00. That means I don't have to get up until 8:30 in the morning. I'm fine with that. This week, I had a three day weekend (Sunday, Monday, Tuesday) because of the May long weekend, so I usually slept in until 10, which was nice. And then I had to work at my usual time on Wednesday, which was fine. And then I worked at 7am today, which, since that is when the store opens, meant that I had to be there closer to 6:30 than to 7. It is a bit of a shock to the system to go from late slumber to early rising. I didn't get home until 11pm and then I definitely didn't go to bed right away, so it was a rather short night.
The weirdest part was that I didn't feel tired at all today until about a half hour ago (it is 10:00 now). Yet I often feel very tired when I get more sleep. Some days I just can't figure my body out.

Now go Grasp the Nettle.

The Brake Pedal is on the Left

2009-05-19T10:41:00.000-07:00

On Friday I went for lunch with my parents, brother, and sister-in-law (aka, mom and dad, Jeff, and Cat). We had just finished enjoying our meal at the Kelsey's when there was a loud bang. My first thought was that someone in the kitchen had fallen and dropped an oven on himself (it was a really loud bang). But as I looked around I realised that it had come from behind an outside wall, so it couldn't have come from the kitchen. Also, everyone along that wall was now rushing outside.
So we followed people outside and learned that someone had ran into the wall of the Kelsey's. With their car. They had pulled up to the parking spot and then hit the gas, jumped the curb, smashed through the glass patio wall (thank goodness no one was sitting out there) and ran into the building. There was a large crack in the wall where the car had hit, and there were also scattered bits of car everywhere. Also also, someone had witnessed the whole thing, including getting the licence plate number, so fleeing the scene was somewhat pointless.
Oh yeah, and the car had missed hitting mine in all of this by a couple of feet at the most.
This is the second time since I bought that vehicle in January that it has been within feet of a serious accident and not gotten a scratch on it. I am trying to figure out if that means it is a lucky car, or if it is an unlucky car. Things happen around it, but not to it. I guess that would make it lucky for me, unlucky for others.
I'm okay with that.

Boom baby

2009-05-18T23:27:00.000-07:00

Well, I got my computer back, and it seems to be running better. It's been a while; I almost forgot to update Grasp the Nettle. And then I remembered.
And then I did.

This Joke Will Never Get Old

2009-05-16T23:27:00.001-07:00

AWOL

2009-05-07T09:53:00.000-07:00

All right, I am updating Grasp the Nettle early this week because I am planning on taking my computer in to get de-FUBARed. It has been running really slow on me lately and having stupid errors, which could just be a Windows thing. Also, my email has been sending out massive amounts of stupid spam. I'm not sure if that is a computer issue as I am using hotmail and not something like Outlook Express (or whatever that mail program is) so nothing is really stored on my actual computer, I think. I'll be honest, I don't really know. Hopefully this will fix things so that I'm not sending out those messages anymore. If it doesn't fix it, then I will have to get a new email address, which is sad because I've had this one for more than ten years.
Ah well, either way, I'm sure my computer needs some fixin', so that will hopefully get done and I can have a computer that works normally (for a Windows product, anyway). But I don't know how long it will take, so I may be incommunicado for a while.
In the meantime, enjoy your weekly dose of Thunderfunk the Superchicken.

1, 2, 3, 4...

2009-05-04T21:01:00.000-07:00

Today, I was involved with an inventory for the first time. We counted everything in our store. Luckily, there are inventory services (which somehow seems...wrong...) which send people to help with the counting. Basically we could scan each item with a little scanner, type in how many of that item there are, and then move on. It took us just over an hour after closing. It was not hard, but I'm glad we don't have to do it often. It's kinda boring.
Anyway, I updated Fools of us All today.

And a little sore.

2009-05-03T12:30:00.000-07:00

I find it funny that some people still look at those who use their cell phones in public as trying to seem important or cool. There was a time when only a select few had a cell phone, so it was a status symbol - if someone pulled out their brick, I mean cell phone, in public and began talking (loudly, probably because reception could not have been great back then), it was a way of getting people to notice that they were important enough to afford a cellular telephone, and busy enough to have to use it in public. Now, even elementary school children have cell phones. I could go down to the mall and for under a hundred bucks I could be talking on a phone (cheap cell, pay-as-you-go 'plan'). So, while it may be annoying to have people talking on their phones in public, usually now it is because they are loud and obnoxious. I think it is safe to stop mocking people for trying to look important by having a cell phone. That's what expensive sports cars and trophy wives are for.
Yesterday (Saturday) I spent the day in Banff. It was good times - we climbed Sulphur Mountain (which is much scarier than it sounds) and I remembered that I've basically stopped doing anything physical at all, ever, and spent the rest of the day apologizing to my body for abusing it so much. I also decided to go without sun screen (aka I didn't think of it at all), so now, from the neck up, I look like Bob the Tomato wearing a blond wig. Of course, the rest of me looks as pale as Casper (the friendly ghost)(boo), so it's an interesting contrast. Ah well, I least I don't have the swine flu.
I would show you pictures of my Banff day, but, of course, I didn't take my camera. I had a reason this time, though. I don't really have batteries for it anymore. Or, more accurately, I don't have charged batteries for it. I used to have a battery charger, but at some point it disappeared on me. I have lent my camera to Jeff a couple of times, and at least once I think I gave them the charger, and now I don't have it. That means either a) Jeff lost it (or it's in his house somewhere), or b) I lost it somewhere along the way. At the moment I am leaning towards option b simply because I moved three times over the summer and I'm not exactly an organised mover. Combine that with the fact that my memory is fuzzy on whether or not I actually gave Jeff the charger, or if I just thought about it and then didn't bother, and I'm inclined to think I lost it. However, just to be on the safe side, I'm going to be a little bitter towards Jeff. But only for a while.
As a Christian, I understand that fasting is one of the spiritual discipline to which I am called. I get it, I'm okay with it, but I am really lousy at actually doing it. The problem is, about two seconds after I start fasting, the only thing I can think about is how much money I save by not eating. Call me crazy if you want, but I don't think that should be the focus. I guess I'll just have to keep trying until I get it right.

Those crazy Swedes.

2009-04-30T21:15:00.000-07:00

After eight months in my current apartment, I finally got some furniture for my room. I had a bed and dresser, and now I have a desk and bookcase. What this means is that I can finally, theoretically, have a clean and organised room. I say theoretically because I have unloaded most of my boxes, but now I have the empty boxes sitting in my room, along with all of the new furniture. But there is a reason.
You see, the desk I bought is from Ikea and it is unfinished wood. That means I get to stain and varnish it. I probably don't have to, but I want to - I like how stained wood looks, and the varnish will help protect it and make it washable. So I have kept the boxes so I have a surface that is not carpet on which to stain. It also means my room is a mess until I get this done.
I'll post pictures when I am done. Maybe.
In the meantime, get a mild chuckle from today's edition of Thunderfunk the Superchicken.

Ads That I Like

2009-04-23T23:46:00.000-07:00

Here are some ads that I like.

Mr. Lube
They have a series right now featuring a guy working at a generic oil change place. Someone will come up to the counter and he will interact with them to hilarious results. In one, oil change guy (OCG) tells the customer (TC) that he (TC) has to call the appointment line to make an appointment, even though he is already at the shop. So TC calls the number causing a phone on the counter to ring. OCG answers the phone, tells TC over the phone to hold, and the lowers the phone and shakes his head in amazement, saying to TC that "they are swamped". My favourite part is how OCG tells the guy to call the number, points to a sign, and then looks down, pointing at the sign again to encourage him to call the number.
Another features the same set up, but this time when the guy calls the number, OCG starts saying "for service in English pres..." only to be interrupted by TC pressing one. OCG then lowers the phone and tells TC not to interrupt. There are a couple of others as well, and all of them make me laugh.

The Alberta Institute of Recycling (or something like that).
These are ads made to encourage people in Alberta to recycle. They are set up much like the old Bud Light institute commercials where a pseudo-scientific lab is set up for hijinx and hilarity. One has a dog that has been trained to retrieve recyclables that have been thrown in the garbage, but when it is released to get the bottle that the tester has thrown in the garbage it jumps and latches onto his crotch, with cringe worthy results. The other features a pill that makes people more likely to recycle. The 'official' of the 'institute' who is explaining these products goes into a testing room where a woman, with her back to the camera, has a bottle in her hand and she is vacillating between the garbage and the recycling bin. Finally she tosses it into the recycling bin and the 'official' seems pleased. And then the woman turns around and she has hair growing out of her face - a huge spot of really long hair from the middle of her cheek, more from her forehead, etc. It's kind of creepy. She smiles at the 'official' and says "hello" in a slightly sultry manner. The official looks distressed and slightly repulsed and says "Sweet Mother!" It is mostly how he says it that is amusing. He quickly closes the door and turns back to the camera. "Of course," he says, "there are still some side effects." Meanwhile, the woman has come up to the door, which has a large window in the top half, and started licking the glass. The man moves to block her from sight, which works until she moves to the other half of the window, which he is not blocking, while still licking it. His reaction and then her licking the glass make me laugh every time.

Ford
Not much to this ad, just a bunch of people extolling the virtues of Ford. It is one of those ads that features a bunch of people saying the same sentence or paragraph, and each person says a few words and then the next person says the next few words, and sometimes the next person will repeat what was just said to emphasize a point. It's been done before, and will be done again. It is executed without any real problems. They repeat things a bit too often for my taste, but that's my only quibble, and it is a minor one at that. I'm honestly not sure why I like this ad except to say that the music, I think, seems to tie it all together rather well. I just like the ad.

Shaw
They have two commercials extolling their contractless cable service. The point of the ads is that contracts for cable service are monoliths of rudeness that leave you trapped. Both ads feature a giant man (eight feet tall or more) made out of paper (or made out of contracts, if you will). The first is a guy on the couch with this man, watching TV. The guy wonders why they are watching the show because it is not funny. He then asks to watch something else, to which the contract replies by spitting a piece of paper onto the man laps which simply reads 'no'.
The second, and more amusing, ad has a woman come home to this giant paper man. She is carrying bags of groceries and the man offers to help her, taking the bags. She then gazes at him lovingly and says "can you believe it has been three moths already?" The man mutters "oh really" drops the bags and sits down, telling the woman to "go make me a sandwich". The woman looks hurt and says "where's the nice contract I fell in love with?", to which the contract replies "he's right here. And he wants a sandwich." And as the picture changes to the information screen and fades out, his voice can be heard one last time saying, "and no crusts".
These ads amuse me because of the voice of the contract, which is slightly accented, and very deep and rumbly even as it is soft. I also like the blatant lack of subtlety on the part of the contract. The second the three months is up, he becomes a boor, demanding a sandwich. The humans do a good job too.

Kia Forte
Somehow Kia followed up a massively disappointing (to me) ad campaign with one that I am enjoying. They have a new vehicle called a Forte. The ads feature people doing things very poorly, saying that "'whatever' is not my forte." Then they indicate their vehicle and say "But that is". Simple but effective. One starts with children in a park suddenly running madly away from a horde of bees, and then it switches to a guy who has a bunch of empty bee...keeping...things. "Bee keeping. Not my Forte," he says before pointing at the car. "But that is." Another is karate (he gets kicked through a window), and another is 'Minding my own business' (he gets tied to a pole by some thugs who didn't have their dog on a leash). Despite their failures, they are all really proud and excited about their car. It makes me feel glad for them, that they have something good going for them.
Also, in very tiny letters at the bottom of the screen on the beekeeping ad, it says "Child actors. No children were harmed in the making of this commercial", which I'm glad to see because I assumed at first that they ambushed some kids in the park by shaking beehives until the bees were frothing at their mouths from anger and then throwing the hives at the children and taping the results, all the while laughing at the pain inflicted on the poor little gaffers.
Was that sarcasm? I can't always tell.
(Yes. Yes it was.)

Grasp the Nettle

I know, I've overanalayzed them.

2009-04-23T22:39:00.000-07:00

I've realised something. I don't watch commercials (or listen to them on the radio) - I critique them. Of course, I often critique them from the standpoint of how relevant they are to me, which means tampon ads make me roll my eyes because I don't need tampons so why are they even bothering to show those commercials. I don't know how it happened but it seems that I've somehow come to the view that advertisers are targeting me all the time, which is absurd. Irregardless (yay for non-words that people use way too often), here are some commercials I have seen recently that I like and dislike.

Sico Paints
Right now Sico Paints has an ad out that features a visual of different paints in different colours splashing around the screen, much like this ad. As a side note, I actually like the ad I just linked to, but it is not the ad to which I am referring. No, the ad I am talking about (BLOGging about?) has similar visuals, but has the song 'True Colours' as its theme, though not sung by Cindy Lauper. The visuals are okay; it is the song that bothers me. To be more specific, it is the combination with the song and the commercial. I have no problem with liscencing a popular song for an ad, but this one doesn't work simply because it is mismatched with the content. Someone obviously heard the song one day and thought to themselves 'hey, this song has the word colours in it and I have to make an ad about paints. It's an obvious match." This ignores the fact that the song is about someone looking beyond what is seen on the surface, past the ugliness that is only surface deep to the pearl that may not be often seen but is in fact truly beautiful. The ad, however, says 'we can put colours on your wall'. If you really want to delve deeply into it, the commercial says 'the true colours are what is on the surface', which is the exact opposite message of the song. That dichotomy really makes me think that the person who decided to use the song only cared that: a) the song had been popular at one point, and b)it had the word 'colours' in the most reconisable part. There was no real thought put into the commercial and that irritates the heck out of me.
The visuals are kinda cool, though.

The Keg
I like the Keg. It's a good restaurant. The song they have on their latest commercials (I think there are two of them) actually makes me not want to go to their restaurant. I actually try to block out the sound of the ad when it comes on. I have no real explanation for why, I just despise the song. I also roll my eyes at what is happening in the restaurant - everyone is having a good time and it's like everyone is one big family: the servers are all in fantastic moods and very perky and friendly, and the group of attractive twenty-something girls are buying drinks for the ruggedly handsome twenty-something attractive men and everyone is just happy and laughing. Maybe it's because I worked in restaurants and know that it is rarely anything like how the ads present it at all, and maybe I'm a bitter old man. Either way, I don't like the ad, but mostly because of the music.

Kelsey's
This ad is very similar to the Keg ad, except that the song is the theme from Cheers. I like the song, but the ad is too similar to the Keg's. I think I saw the Keg ad first and this one suffered for that.

ScotiaBank's 2% cash back credit card
I've already discussed this ad (March 23, 2009). It drives me nuts.

Boston Pizza
They came out with an ad that featured a family (Father, Mother, Daughter, Son, Baby boy) who were very alike in manner and appearance - they all wore black rimmed glasses and were very conservatively dressed, and they all questioned the price of the BP's $9.99 menu, wondering if each item was actually that price, if the price was the first of three easy payments, etc. The hook at the end was that the baby, no more than ten months old and also wearing the same glasses, also piped up with a question. That ad was okay. Now they've come out with a sequel promoting their 'italian' food special, where the baby reminices about his time in 'Roma'. I understand why it was made - even if it hadn't been planned from the start, the original was interesting enough to be somewhat popular, and companies want recognisable 'mascots' (for lack of better term). I just don't think the concept lent itself enough to be ongoing, and the initial surprise of the talking baby is gone, so now it is boring and somewhat obvious: "Hey, the baby talks. Let's make him talk every time now and make him do things that he obviously wouldn't do alone because he's just a bayyyybbbbeeeeeeeeeee!"

Chevy
They have two I'm thinking of right now. One has a guy talking about how the Chevy...Traverse (I think?)(their midsize 'crossover') has more storage space than Honda's comparable vehicle. I just don't like the guy who is doing the talking. For some reason, I don't trust him. And this isn't my anti-Chevy bias (which I picked up from Peter) shining through because I always thought it was an ad for Toyota or Honda until recently. I never paid attention to which car had better storage.
The other Chevy ad is promoting their warantee (that's a hard word to spell)(I think I got it wrong) plan and their three years of inclusive service or whatever it is, and their various other guarantees. It features a different guy walking through various buildings as he is giving the information. I think I don't like this one largely because I don't like how they filmed him walking and talking. I'm not sure if I would dislike any method of him walking and talking or if it is just the approach used in this commercial, but either way, I don't like it. Makes me want to go buy a Ford.

Kia Soul
There were some teaser commercials a little while ago that featured people doing something or about to do something, and then they would stop and walk right up into the camera like it was a window they were looking through, and they would peer intently at... A website would then pop up: peerintoasoul.ca. That was the entire commercial. They lasted maybe fifteen seconds. I saw these many times and was very intrigued, always telling myself that I should check out the website because this had some potential. Optomistic me thought that this was advertising a website that might discuss philosophical, ethical, moral, and spiritual issues in a very serious way - somewhere that people could go and it would be moderated so that stupid comments (and so called Trolls) would be prohibitted and eliminated immediately. Either that or it was something very artistic, fraught with questions not answered.
Nope. It was a car.
To be fair, the full length commercials are actually amusing. One has some Mafia thugs distracted by this new car, and while their backs are turned their victim, with arms and legs still bound, hops away to freedom. Another has a cabin surrounded by the forest at night while a group of pyjama clad sorority girls are inside, listening to music, painting their nails, having a pillow fight, etc., just waiting for the psycho to come slaughter them. On the way, the psycho gets distracted by the car, and when the scene cuts, it is now morning and the sun is up, the birds are chirping, the still living sorority girls are beginning to stir from their slumber and the axe-weilding, mask wearing psycho suddenly realises it is morning and he runs off into the woods. The ads aren't bad, but they are tainted by the potential that was wasted.
On a car.

Tomorrow I'll post the commercials I have seen that I actually like, just so you don't think I am merely a hater. I might have too much free time on my hands.

I drank milk that was a week past its expiration date and it tasted fine. My fridge scares me sometimes.

And then I updated Grasp the Nettle.

Grizzly Adams indeed.

2009-04-21T21:15:00.000-07:00

In the hockey playoffs, the players stop shaving until their team is eliminated. That is the only reason I hope Anaheim Ducks go deep in the playoffs. Scott Neidermeyer has the best playoff beard. It's awesome!
Mike Commodore looks like a chia pet exploded. I want him and Neidermeyer to face each other in a battle of the beards.
To the death!

I've never had a turkey

2009-04-20T19:57:00.000-07:00

I just found out that five-pin bowling is a Canadian game. I knew it wasn't popular in the USA, but I assumed it was basically invented around the same time in the same place. Turns out, some dude in Ontario in the early 1900s developed it, and it's not played in the US much. I was surprised.
Duckpin bowling is basically a combination of five and ten pin bowling - three tries to knock down ten pins that are much smaller than regular ten pin bowling pins, and even smaller than five-pin bowling pins (which are smaller than ten-pin pins). It sounds kinda lame.
Candlepin bowling is much like ten pin, but the pins are very odd looking. I like the look of them, but I'm not sure what I think of the game itself. I'm intrigued by the fact that the pins aren't cleared away when they are knocked down. I'll have to try it someday, which means I'll have to go out east as it is generally only played in the Maritimes and Maine, which is odd. But hey, travel out east, that's cool.
My internet is going real slow right now.
Ten pin bowling is not really my thing, though it would be cool to learn how to make it curve. I do enjoy seeing a bowler throw the ball at the gutter and have it end up hitting on the opposite side of the pins. That is impressive.
Kegel is a German variation of bowling. I played it in Germany (as near as I can tell - I don't remember seeing what it was called...my internet is back to normal now...but from the brief description I read, I'm pretty sure it is). It could have been fun...actually, we all had a good time anyway. It could have been more fun if we had understood the rules or how to score or anything like that at all, but it was interesting.
I enjoy bowling. It's a fun game to play and not too difficult to learn, though it does take some skill to master. I'm a five pinner, so if I ever ended up living in the States, I probably wouldn't bowl much. But here in Canada, it's fun to just hang out with people and knock a few pins down.

Also, I'm updated Nettle again. Or I will in the next couple of hours. Either way, check it out.

Tomorrow

2009-04-14T22:40:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I feel like the world is so close. I get these weird flashes of energy and enthusiasm and it feels like the solution to all of my various problems are just barely out of reach. I know that if I just call this person, pick up this thing and go to this place, everything will improve. I'm ready to go, willing to hop in my car to do it. The problem is this almost always happens at night, and by the time I'm ready to go, this person is asleep, this store is closed, and if I go outside, I'll get mugged. Okay, that last part is not necessarily true, but it is dark and scary outside.
So I decide to do whatever it is I need to do tomorrow. And then I wake up in the morning and I'm tired because my energy wouldn't let me sleep until much later than I should be up. I then have to go to work and by the time work is done, I just want to go home and I don't mind if I kick a small puppy along the way because it has been that kind of day, even when it hasn't. I get home and fall into my mind-numbing routines (because a numb mind doesn't have to think or try) and even if I have mild stirrings of the feeling, they produce fear and loathing instead of optimism and eagerness, so I just don't bother. It's very frustrating.
It doesn't help that I am somewhat cynical and pessimistic. It's not that I completely expect the worst of everything, but I do tend to think the worst of myself. Plus, I've seen enough from people in general to expect poor decisions and failure in general. Some would say the same thing and then try to tell people that they are 'not pessimistic, just realistic'. I say, call it what you want, it's pessimism, even if it is justified. But that's just a side rant. The point is, when I'm not firmly in the grips of my enthusiasm and energy, I tend to not be able to muster enough energy to care about what seemed so important only hours ago.
I think part of the problem is that I sometimes get too caught up in the big picture and start to ignore the little picture. For example, if I went to somewhere in Asia where they have the temples at the top of very high hills with massive staircases (you know the kind - with 1000 steps or more)(I've seen them in movies), I would not only have trouble getting to the top, I would have trouble even bothering to begin because I would see all of the steps and not be able to gather the energy to begin. But if I just looked at the first twenty stairs, I would be able to do that. And then, once I'm that far, I could do the next twenty-five, and then the next eighteen until I suddenly find myself at the top. Basically the solution to all of life's problems are a series of smaller steps, and it is only when I look at the entire staircase that I doubt myself and fail.
This all sounds good now, but how will I feel tomorrow?

Fact

2009-04-14T11:27:00.000-07:00

Cheese tastes better when it is grated.

Nettle

Random Musings (as I watch TV)

2009-04-12T11:21:00.000-07:00

There's an ad for Enterprise car rentals that has an elderly woman with her adult son 'discussing' the car they rented for her trip - she thinks Enterprise sounds expensive, and the fact that they are picking her up at her house definitely makes it seem very pricey. After being assured that Enterprise is not expensive, the mother then says "If it's not expensive, then why didn't you get me a bigger car?" I had only heard this ad and never watched it, but when I finally watched the end, the look on the son's face confirmed my thoughts - the son is hoping that the mother doesn't return from the trip. His internal answer to the above question is "because you are a terrible shrew of a woman and you make my life horrible"...the woman's hockey championship just ended and as the women were removing their helmets and celebrating, all of them were pulling out hair bands so they could tie back their hair. All of them did it, and I have no idea where they got them from (wore them on their wrists during the game?). Just one more way that the women's game is different from the men's...also, I never find myself thinking that the defencemen are pretty cute in the men's games...if we tell kids that they should play sports and have fun, and then lose our minds when our athletes don't do well in the Olympics, is that a mixed message?...I'm no economist, but I do truly believe that part of the reason that the economy has been hit as hard as it has is because of the neverending coverage of every little thing on TV and the internet. People don't understand the stock market and related things and when they hear things are bad they panic without really understanding why...that being said, the whole mortgage thing in the US really was a massive screw up and that part of the 'crisis' is understandable...the fact that I used the word 'crisis' shows the effect of the hyperbole that is reported - it is bad, but crisis is a bit extreme...these things go in cycles. It will pick up again...This may show my natural bias, but I like the new Ford ads and I despise the new Chev ads...I don't know if anyone has noticed, but Ford hasn't gone to the government for money like Chev and Dodge have...I also don't like Toyota's latest ad for some reason...I miss Vanessa...she was my Crown Victoria...ah, lost loves...as a white male from North America, sometimes I feel like my culture is universally looked down upon...and then I ask myself "what culture?"...golf announcers are funny...I knew a guy named Clay Chestnut...I still think he should have been a country singer...I was watching a movie and one of the actors stumbled over his line: "This whole sh...this whole shelf looks suspect". It didn't sound like it was done on purpose, it sounded like he actually stumbled over his words, like people do all the time in the real world but almost never do in the movies...it made me happy to hear that...when you do your taxes, make sure you fill out all lines properly...I think films today are often edited too slickly - many older movies are somewhat slow in their editting, leaving spaces between sentences, little moments in the film of nothing that can do a great deal to affect the mood of the film, but many movies don't do that anymore, like they are afraid of silence...that's too bad...would you pronounce 'economically' with a long 'e' or a short 'e'...I think I'd choose the long 'e' most of the time...one guy wearing an eighties style male tank top (the 'neckline' plunges to below the ribcage and it basically has no sides), tightish leatherish shorts and a fanny pack, and the other guy is wearing a pair of too short denim shorts and a white t-shirt that shows of his stomach...the eighties (and early nineties) were a dark, dark, dark, comically and nauseatingly dark time for fashion...that's why I never complain about the baggy clothes, because it way beats the alternative...and I'm out...

Squeeze Bacon

2009-04-10T11:55:00.000-07:00

...
I'm speechless. It's bacon in a bottle!

It's enough to make me wish it were real...

I win?

2009-04-09T17:39:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I parked at work and thought I had done a bang up job. Turns out I was a bit crooked - not enough to be in the way, but definitely not completely straight. I didn't think much of it until I looked out again later and noticed that a car had parked beside me, also crooked, at the same angle as me. As I watched throughout the day I noticed that every car that parked beside me also parked slightly crooked, despite the straight lines that were clearly painted on the ground. By the time I was finished work, the entire row of cars was parked crooked.
Apparently I'm a trendsetter.

Grasp the Nettle

Almost a Sonnet. Kinda. Sorta.

2009-04-06T22:18:00.000-07:00

My head hurts.
I updated Grasp the Nettle.
The two are unrelated.

Is that poetry?

Sad News

2009-04-03T00:04:00.001-07:00

I just found out today that my uncle died. He had been battling with cancer for a few years now. A while back they had amputated his foot to try and stop it from spreading. By the end, as sad as it was for him to pass away, it was for the best. From all accounts he went fairly peacefully and with a minimum of pain given the circumstances so that is merciful at least.
I don't really have much more to say right now.
Good bye Uncle Gord. You are gone, but you won't be forgotten. See you in heaven.

Gooooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat

2009-03-30T11:21:00.001-07:00

A while back, I was listening to the sports radio station here in Calgary, and the issue of whether or not the Flames goalie was being overworked was raised. The DJ on the station scoffed at the notion and said 'it seems like every year at this time this question is raised at this time' (not actually an exact quote, just a paraphrase), and that he always seemed to answer the critics. Later that day on TSN, they were also talking about the Flames goalie and they showed an interesting graphic. A few years ago when the Flames almost won the Stanley Cup, Kipper (their goalie) only played 40 games or so during the regular season as he came over in a trade half way through the season and taking over the starting job. The next three years, he played 74, 74, and 76 games, and they lost each season in the first round. So basically, when he didn't play a whole lot and was fresh, he got an eighth place team to within a goal of winning the whole thing. When he played most of a season (there are only 82 games), he can't steal the first round when they were playing, at least some of the time, a team that did worse in the regular season. Is it just me or is that not a telling statistic?
I think the Calgary sports media needs to actually examine these things before they lift their players to near god-like status.
I have no idea why I thought of that today, but there it is. Speaking of today, I updated Grasp the Nettle again. and here it is.

Programming note

2009-03-26T18:16:00.000-07:00

Yesterday on TV I saw a very serious commercial. The tag line of the ad was "Not every suicide note..." and I didn't catch the rest of the line (I was at work, so it's not like I could just stand there and watch). I did catch that it was for a organisation that is trying to raise awareness about and to stop eating disorders (so the ad was saying that people, especially teenaged women, are killing themselves with the disease, as opposed to other 'more conventional' forms of suicide). It was a bit creepy and slightly disturbing, but in the way that makes a person think about what they've seen and remember.
The very next commercial started with a close up of a woman trying to get her jeans on, but not being able to do up the button because she was too 'fat'. Her friend then tells her about Special K and how it will help her get skinny enough to wear the jeans.
So basically, the TV told people that eating disorders are bad, but being fat is bad too, and the woman in the second commercial was by no means fat. She was no stick, but she didn't even look like she was overweight. I couldn't believe I saw that.

On a more cooler note, check this out. Picture 8 is the coolest.

And finally, it's a bit late, but here's the next installment of Thunderfunk the Superchicken.

1-2-3

2009-03-23T22:21:00.000-07:00

I was watching wrestling today and suddenly I forgot it wasn't real. I was so confused because I couldn't figure out why the wrestlers were acting like they were. They should have been much angrier than they were and much more confrontational. It took me a while to remember that it is scripted, which is half of the fun. The other half is watching the true athleticism of these people. It is impressive.
Anyway, I updated Grasp the Nettle.
Me so sleepy.

A comercial success? Not exactly.

2009-03-23T00:25:00.000-07:00

There is an ad out right now for a credit card that gives cash back on all purchases. The commercial starts with two women buying some groceries at the supermarket. One pays with cash, the other with her credit card. The cash woman is slightly skeptical about the the benefit of getting cash back on the card. "What did you get, two dollars?" she asks somewhat dismissively. "Yeah," replies her friend, "what did you get?" She then walks off screen (possibly getting hit by a vehicle in the parking lot as retribution for her attitude of superiority...that's left somewhat vague and ambiguous) while her friend looks surprised.
There are a couple of things about the ad that I notice. First of all, much of the 'conflict' of the ad revolves around the fact that the cash woman is surprised by the other woman using her credit card. The groceries she bought had to equal twenty to thirty dollars at least. In my experience, it is not surprising at all to see people use their credit card for purchases much smaller than that. It is possible that there is a back story here to which we are not privy - perhaps the credit card woman had problems with overspending on credit cards in the past and had vowed to never use a credit card again, and that is why the cash lady is surprised. But it really seems to be set up as though the cash lady is surprised that anyone would use their credit card for such a small purchase.
The second thing I notice is that the woman who uses the credit card is white, while the person who uses the cash is not. She seems to be of East Indian origin, or perhaps more middle eastern. I can't remember exactly at the moment, but whatever she is, she is not white. It is perhaps an indication of the times that I would even notice that. I'm not saying I'm offended by it, because I'm not. But I am very aware of it. Anytime there is a part played by a 'minority', I can't help but critique the role on the basis of its racial-nicity. That's a good word.
All that to say, I'm not against the card, seems like a good idea, but I don't really like the ad.

Musically Inclined

2009-03-21T01:03:00.000-07:00

When I was in high school, I remember being involved in a conversation about secular music vs christian music. Someone made the point that secular music can still have a grain of truth and another person wondered why anyone would want a grain of truth when they could have the whole thing in christian music.
I didn't say anything at the time, and I'm not even sure if I thought of any sort of answer to that question right then, but the question has been with me ever since, and that was over ten years ago. At some point a thought struck me - when someone trains to be a doctor, his first day of schooling does not involve performing open heart surgery at the local hospital. When babies are born they don't start eating steak and potatoes (unless they're Chuck Norris). Kindergarten is naps, snacks and sand boxes, not calculus, quantum physics and detailed analysis of King Lear. Sometimes, a kernel of truth is all that a person can handle, and all that a person is ready for. An oak tree comes from planting a tiny seed.
And along the way, another thought struck me. Christianity does not hold the exclusive rights to the truth. The truth is out there and it is possible for people to see it, and artists are especially adept at looking at the world and questioning it. When you question the world, sometimes the truth pops out, even when the questions don't necessary lead to God. I heard a song once about how women should respect themselves and how men need to start respecting women and not treating them like mere objects of fantasy and lust. Other songs by that band were extreme foul, crude, loud, angry and basically any other adjective for bad you can think of. Yet somehow they stumbled across this little piece of truth and put it out for the world to hear. It seemed odd, but that didn't make it any less true.

Once Again

2009-03-19T23:27:00.000-07:00

As promised, I have updated Thunderfunk the Superchicken yet again. You should check it out. It involves sock puppets.