Thunderfunk the Superchicken - Pt 2

2. Designing Large Empty Rooms for Megalomaniacal Geniuses

Thunderfunk ran down the hall to the secret stairway. Given that the staircase was simply behind a door that was marked “Not A Secret Stairway”, it wasn’t really much of a secret, but he had only been living there for a couple months, and other things had taken priority. But rest assured, he would get to it.
A quick journey down a few flights of stairs later he burst into the war room. Originally it had been a series of underground passages, storage rooms and hidden rooms that he had dug out and renovated into a thoroughly state of the art centre for his schemes. At the far end there was a lab set up for scientific experiments, and light baking. A passageway about halfway down led to a private jet hangar at the far ends of his estate grounds. It was wide enough a hall to accommodate a pair of modified golf carts side by side. The hangar itself housed four different types of aircraft: a helicopter, a completely restored Curtis JN-4 biplane, a heavily modified Stearman biplane, and a Harrier Jet. Both he and Straw Daq were proficient pilots, though Straw was the better of the two, and had made a living doing barnstorming at air shows before he met Thunder. At the near end of the war room was a series of exercise stations, giving him a place work out and unwind after tough days, as well as keeping him well trained for any fights that he may need to engage in. In the dead centre of the room was a large raised platform which housed his computers on one side, a table and chairs set up for meetings and the such, and a coffee station, because he seemed to find it hard to come up with dastardly schemes without a cup or two of java inside of him. Sometimes he wondered if he was addicted to the stuff, but usually he gave it no thought.
Already seated at one of the computer terminals, Straw was regarding a screen that was scrolling through some technical information. He turned his head slightly in acknowledgement of Thunderfunk’s entrance before going back to his readouts.
Thunder climbed the stairs and leaned over Straw’s shoulder, looking at the information. “Is this what I think it is?” he clucked softly.
Straw nodded. “It seems that he has decided to move earlier than we had expected.” The information stopped then, coming to the end, and he cleared the screen before turning around and regarding the large chicken worriedly. “I don’t know if we’re ready to stop him.”
A grin, a particularly evil grin, played across Thunder’s face, the red comb on the top of his head looking particularly menacing. “Don’t you worry, lad, we’re ready. He may be evil, but don’t you ever forget that Thunderfunk the Superchicken is the most evil of them all. And I think it’s time we paid Dr. Cornelius J. Breadbuuter a visit.” He turned on his heel and strode to the massive screen at the edge of the platform. Typing in a few commands, he brought up a display of the information that they had on the vile Dr. Breadbuuter.
Dr. Cornelius J. Breadbuuter held a PhD in Physics and Chemistry. He was obviously a genius, but he was also very evil. Thunderfunk and Breadbuuter had attended school together, where they had been very competitive. Whether it was competing to see who could get the highest mark in class, or seeing who could get the most bruises by running into the wall, they had always tried to outdo each other. Even now, years later, they still competed fiercely, trying to outdo each other’s insane plots. The latest scheme involved a series of political moves calculated to bring down a few major governments around the world through military skirmishes and mishaps engineered by the bad Dr. The ensuing chaos and manufactured scandals would cause the leaders to topple, leaving massive power voids that Breadbuuter was willing to fill. The information that Straw had been perusing had contained orders from the various armies regarding where they were going to be in the next few days. There had also been pictures of naval fleets putting out to sea, heading for potential hot spots. It appeared that the various fighting forces were starting to warm up, a scenario that was very dire indeed.
Thunderfunk regarded the plans intensely, formulating and discarding various counter-plans. After a few moments of silence, he straightened up and turned abruptly. “Ready the Harrier,” he said briskly, “we need to go pay this madman a visit. If we talk him out of it, I get bonus points, which would put me far ahead in the dastardly deeds competition.”
With a roll of his eyes, Straw rose to his feet. “Couldn’t we just walk?” he asked. “The guy lives next door. I know you both have large estates, but it’s only a five minute walk at the most. Besides, you’re starting to get a bit of a spare tire, if you know what I mean. The walk would do you good.”
Thunder looked down at his waist then back at his pilot. “Listen ‘friend’” he began hotly. “I am in perfect condition. And besides, the jet gives off an impression of power and superiority. He doesn’t have one, so it makes me look good.” A haughty expression settled on his face as he raised his head ever so slightly and peered down his beak at Daq.
“Fine.” Straw went down the stairs, muttering about the price of jet fuel these days, and did anyone know how much cabbage cost and how late it would be before he could get to bed, basically sounding like an old man.
Beady eyes turned to face the screen once again. “I think it’s time we twuly exfamind your twue mind, Dr Corneliuff…mmmfff…” The rest of his sentence was cut off as he placed more cookies in his mouth. They really were delicious cookies. Evilly delicious.