And vent!

I don't like rude people, but I can't seem to avoid them. I was at work last week and I was the closing server. That means I'm there until the restaurant closes (I know, shocking), which isn't a bad gig, really. It means I get to work more hours, and by the end of the night it's usually pretty slack. Come to think of it, that's when I like working as a server the best, when it's a bit laid back and relaxed. Anyway, on this particular day, Canada Day now that I think of it, the restaurant decided to close early because it was the holiday and it was very dead. So Jeff, our manager (not my brother) puts two large signs on the door saying "Due to the Canada Day holiday, we will be closing at ten o'clock today" or something to that effect. The new closing time of ten o'clock was definitely on there. At 9:10, a group of about 10 people come in, an even mix of adults and kids. Fortunately they only ordered a couple things to share (and were actually apologetic about being there so late) and were out of the restaurant before 10. At 9:30, I look up, and watch as a group of six people walk up to the door. As they walk in, every single one of them reads the sign. Yet they still come in and ask to be seated. After that table, we had two more tables come in and order.
What's so rude about that, you may be asking yourself. After all, we are a restaurant, and it is our job to serve people.
I will not argue that point. It is our job to serve them, which is exactly what we did. However, I would ask this question to you in return. How would you like to have someone come to your job when you have fifteen minutes before you finish and make you stay an extra hour just because they want to. If you ask me, that is completely rude, yet that is exactly what people do. We once had a group of 15 people come into the restaurant ten minutes before closing, and even after we had mentioned that we were closing right away (they thought that we were open later than we really were, so we had to tell them when we really closed) they still wanted to stay. Fortunately one of the people in the group was kind enough to point out that with us closing right away it wasn't very nice to make us stay late, so they left to somewhere that was open later. But she was right, it wouldn't have been very nice. A group that size would have been at least another hour, maybe longer, before they left. That would have pushed the kitchen guys back in their closing duties, as well as the bartender and the dishwasher. If you ask me, it's just rude to force someone to work late for your own pleasure. There are very few people out there who would actually be happy if someone came in right at the end of the day and told them to stay longer, yet it seems like it is okay to make servers do it.
That's not the only example of rude people I've come across in a restaurant. I'm not even talking the obvious ones, the people who are just mean to their waiter or waitress, who demand every little thing and have an attitude problem. That is definitely a problem, but not the only problem. The main one I run into is simply not listening. I know that when you go out for a meal with people, you want to talk with them and laugh and joke around and just generally relax. Frankly, as a server, I want you to be relaxed too. It makes everyone's life easier that way. However, please try to pay attention. I don't know how many times I have come to a table and been completely ignored. I'm not trying to interrupt, I'm just trying to do my job. If they were trying to talk to me and I ignored them, these same people would complain loudly, many of them refusing to tip and/or demanding a discount on their food for the poor service. Yet when I come to the table and try to take their order, they just keep on talking as though I weren't there. How am I supposed to serve a person that refuses to acknowledge that I am even in the same room as them.
Hand in hand with that is the long decision making times of some people. I should probably clarify that. It's not that I want everyone to decide instantly. I don't really care if it takes you an hour to decide. I actually had a table that sat for almost that long before they decided, but I didn't care, because I had other things to do, and I kept an eye on them, so that when they were decided I took their order right away and everyone was happy. Taking a long time to decide is annoying when I am at the table waiting. I'll ask if everyone is ready, and someone will just start ordering, so I assume that everyone is ready. And then I wait while they argue back and forth and completely ignore me. Often I'll ask if they want a couple minutes to decide, and they'll say no, but it takes them two minutes to finally decide what they want. This is especially bad where I work because we are supposed to crouch at the tables so that we aren't looming over our guests. Crouching for that long starts to get painful.
These two types of rudeness (long decisions and ignoring) are rude because of the time it takes away from everyone and everything else that is my responsibility. While I'm waiting for someone to decide on their meal, two other tables are going thirsty and getting mad at me because I am ignoring them, or so it seems to them. While I am being ignored, my other table waiting to order, the table that is ready, is being ignored and starting to get upset at my 'poor service', merely because I am trying to give good service to a table that is, for all intents and purposes, treating me like barely tolerable servant.
Seriously, just try and pay attention when in a restaurant. When I come around, I'm not trying to be rude, I'm merely trying to make sure you have everything that you want. Watch for me and give me your attention for just as long as I need it. I will go away and you can go back to talking about how Uncle Frank nearly blew himself up with that firecracker, or whatever else is on your mind. I'm just trying to do my job. And also realise that every restaurant in the world makes their servers work more than one table at a time. That means that there is a good chance, especially when it is busy, that I have other guests who want to be treated as well as you do. So if you need more time, please let me know so that I can go help out others. Believe it or not, that is my cheif concern. Making sure everyone is happy is the whole reason I'm working as a server. Even if you think that a server isn't that altruistic, realise that even if I'm just trying to make you happy just to get a tip, I'm still trying to make you happy. Whatever my reason, that is my goal. And since you're not the only one I'm serving, allow me to try and make everyone happy.
Also, treat me like a real human. Sometimes it seems like some people come into a restaurant and feel like this is their only shot at being royalty, so they had better make the best of it. They demand every little thing from us all the time, wanting this and that and the other thing, and sending the meal back to be fixed because it doesn't look exactly like the picture, which is of a different item but don't try to tell them that they are wrong because the customer is always right! Actually, no you're not. And I don't care who you are or what reason you have for coming to the restaurant, it doesn't give you the right to treat me as less than human. If you don't like being ignored, why would I like it? And yet, there I am, smiling pleasantly while you heap burning ashes upon my head. Is the power trip worth it? I hope so. Also, when I go back into the kitchen, I hope your car explodes when you try to start it. On really bad days I start gathering ingredients that will ensure it does.
Okay, maybe that's a bit extreme, but seriously people, remember the golden rule, as it has been termed. And don't blame me for things I cannot control, such as prices, or the kitchen making a mistake on your food, or running out of a certain item. I don't pick prices or portion sizes, I don't cook your food, and I am certainly not in charge of ordering the food. Please don't blame me for any of that.
Well, I feel better. These are some of the things that are irritating about working in a restaurant. Don't get me wrong, I actually do enjoy it for the most part. There are bad days, but pretty much any job will have those, so I'm not terribly concerned about that. And I can only speak for myself when I say this: I really am solely concerned with making sure you are happy and satisfied with your meal and service. I am not thinking about how much you will tip me if I'm this nice to you. I'm just trying to make sure you enjoy your experience. I've been a customer before, so I know what bad service looks like and feels like. I don't want you to experience any of that.
Finally, a caveat. I said 'you' many times during the course of this rant, and rant it truly was, but please understand that this is not directed at anyone in specific. Of the people that I know of reading this, I have eaten out with pretty much all of you, and I have never seen any reason to direct anything like this at any one of you. I just found it easier to say what I wanted to say by phrasing it that way.
Well, thanks for listening, I'll catch you later.